


My Heart Knew

by LadyFrandrews



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Billy's POV, M/M, Soulmates AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-20
Updated: 2019-06-08
Packaged: 2019-10-13 14:33:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 29,766
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17489801
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyFrandrews/pseuds/LadyFrandrews
Summary: He knows his reputation isn't the best, but he's never messed around when it comes to his heart.Before she died, his Ma spoke to him all the time about what having a soulmate meant.But he's seen what happens when your soulmate dies and he doesn't want his. Not if it means he's going to turn into his old man. Or try to make a pretend, happy family with someone else who's lost their soulmate too.He was doing just fine until they uprooted and replanted themselves in Hawkins.His pendant never changed temperature until they got closer and closer to this shitty little town.He absolutely ignored the prickling it caused underneath his skin the night at Tina's Halloween party.  It's been months.





	1. You're Lying

**Author's Note:**

> So I found this prompt on a Google search...something about getting necklaces at birth and it goes warm and cold and whatnot when you're near/far your soulmate. I'm adding my own twist to it. 
> 
> Hope y'all like this one!

* * *

 

Billy’s always proudly shown off his pendant. His mom gave it to him the day he was born. She said it was special, and would let him know when he finally found the one his heart and soul would love with everything he has to offer. 

 

She’d written him a letter before she died, outlining the details of his special pendant. Neil hates it. Hates that there’s another visible reminder of the woman he loved, who’s gone. Besides the obvious face that stares back at him in their son. 

 

Billy knows Neil doesn’t always  _ mean  _ to get rough. He’s hurting. He buried his own necklace with her, the day they put her in the ground. He’s read stories about soulmates. His heart aches for his father, but he’s long since learned that Neil’s forever stuck in the anger stage of his grief over losing his soulmate. 

 

He realizes the day he meets Susan and Max, the redheaded woman has a necklace of her own that she never takes off. He asks Max about it once, when they were still getting acquainted with each other--could tolerate the other’s existence. 

 

She’d said it’s cold. It’s been cold since her mom was seventeen and her then boyfriend was drafted into the war over in Nam, and that was that. Max’s old man was Susan’s soulmate’s best friend. 

He’s known that he’s never cared about the packaging someone comes in, he’s fooled around plenty with girls and guys alike, but he’s learned that Neil and Susan don’t approve of him. 

 

Susan doesn’t interfere when Neil disciplines Billy. She did it once. The night, the cause, the reason they’re now pulling up to some shitty house in the middle of nowhere. He thinks it’s somewhere near Ohio, called Hawk-something. He doesn’t know, nor does he care.

 

He’s a little overwhelmed by the fact that his pendant has gotten warmer the closer they’ve gotten to here. It doesn’t burn him per se, but he can tell it’s calling out to someone. 

 

But he promised Susan, that night, as they both sat in the emergency room, getting his shoulder reset and two fingers splinted, that he would put off dating until he left for college. She promised she’d put away money for both he and Max when they started over. 

 

So he doesn’t date anyone. He ignores the heat as it fluctuates throughout his days as we walks the halls of Hawkins High. Ignores the way it made his skin prickle when Tommy introduced him to-- _ no _ \--he’s good at pretending to be interested when he’d rather be anywhere else. None of the girls have complained so far. And none of them have spilled the beans. They probably think it’s adorable that he’s taking his time. He’s not rushing into dating anyone. 

 

Max asks him one night, _months_ after that clusterfuck that was that night at the creepy house on the outskirts of town. She asks him if he’s felt it change. He asks her why she’s asking--she wants to know what it’s supposed to feel like. 

 

She doesn’t wear her own necklace around her neck, it’s twisted around her wrist. She says sometimes it goes warm, but mostly it stays cold. So her soulmate’s not Lucas Sinclair, and she’s disappointed.  

 

So he tells her about his mom’s letter. Even goes so far as to pull it out of its hiding place and lets her read the words for herself. He hates that he can read her disappointment clear as day on her face. She likes that Sinclair kid, and he adores her. 

 

He doesn’t like the way she looks at him when she’s finished reading it. She’s weighing her opinion to see if it’s worth sharing with him. 

 

“You’ve found yours. _Here_. In Hawkins.”

 

He freezes. She knows she’s caught him off guard, and that she’s right.

 

“Do you know who it is?”

 

“No,” he says out-loud, but his heart screams yes. 

 

“You’re lying.”

 

“It doesn’t matter. I’m sure with my shitty luck, it’s just one-sided.”

 

“Lucas told me that I’m his. I don’t, I can’t, how do I tell him he’s not mine?”

 

“Max, you’re a kid, you don’t have to worry about this stuff now. Not if you don’t want to.”

 

“You found yours, that’s why you took your necklace off. You don’t want the constant reminder.”

 

They hear the front door open and immediately split ways in the house. He goes to the kitchen to check on the pot roast in the slow-cooker and start sides for dinner. She goes to her room, leaving the television on. 

 

“Oh thank you Billy, I’d have gotten the rest of dinner together,” Susan says as she sets grocery bags on the table.

 

“Where’s your sister?” He hears Neil ask. 

 

“In her room, homework I believe.”

 

He wordlessly helps Susan put groceries away as Neil goes to verify that precious Maxine is in fact in her bedroom like he said. 

 

He knows a few minutes later as footsteps go to the living room and the channel changes to the evening news that Neil’s in his spot. He won’t move until he’s notified dinner’s ready. 

 

He stirs the corn and green beans on the stove. Knowing that Max and Neil will only eat the green beans, and he and Susan will eat both. 

 

“Did she ask you about your soulmate today?”

 

He drops the spoon on the floor. She waves him off and bends herself to pick it up, taking it to the sink to rinse.

 

“She doesn’t, Maxine, she’s never believed in soulmates. Not even after, after everything I shared with her. I’m sorry Billy, I just, I think she thought because you’re still searching that you might relate a bit better than me or your dad will. You know, because both of ours have died.”

 

He didn’t know what to say. He felt angry, embarrassed, and overwhelmed even more. 

 

“Uh, I, yeah, she, she uh, she asked me. She thinks she’s on the not-reciprocated half of a match. He’s not hers, but she’s his.”

 

“Oh,” she says, and he hates that she sounds a little devastated. “Maybe it’s for the best, she can focus on growing up first.”

 

He knows she wants to ask about him, when he sees her eyes linger on the _empty_ space around his neck. Max was right. He took it off. He _doesn’t_ want that constant reminder. 

 

They move around each other, finishing up dinner and setting the table. She’s the one to go tell Neil and Max that food’s ready. 

 

Hours later, after he’s certain everyone’s fallen asleep, he digs his necklace out of his sock drawer. Putting it around his neck and letting the warmth from the pendant spread through him. 

 

He curls up on his side, one of his hands clutching the necklace in a tight grip and he lets himself think about the what could be, the life his mom wanted him to have with his soulmate. He knows they could be so happy together. So good together. 

 

He doesn’t cry, but his eyes sting with that familiar burn and his vision blurs a little. He’s fucked it all up. His soulmate will never want him back, not after what he did to them. 

 

It’s his burden to carry.


	2. New Friend Now

* * *

 

He doesn’t remember falling asleep, but he doesn’t remove his necklace in the morning when he gets up, the family putting on their Sunday best to go to church. He tucks it under his shirt, and actually wears his tie for once.

 

He's grateful that he only has to stay long enough for a few hymns and at least two prayers. Susan usually allows Max to leave with him.

 

His pendant is warm, and causing the same kind of prickly feeling he got the night of the Halloween party, and the night Max knocked him out. He doesn't want to look up and around.

 

He doesn't want to see his soulmate look at him with loathing.

 

He doesn't realize that he started to play with his necklace until he and Max are in the car and headed towards the house.

 

“I'm, uh, Billy, why do you hide from your soulmate? It's supposed to be the best thing to ever happen in your life, and, and you, you're just _ignoring_ them. Oh my God, do _they_ even _know?_ ”

 

He shrugs. He's not going to tell her that he's _never_ seen them wearing a necklace.

 

“Is, is it, is it a boy? I, I'm not stupid and I don't think it's right that mom and Neil give you shit for liking who you like.”

 

He almost veers off the road but corrects the car easily.

 

“Jesus Christ, Max, you, you can't just say shit like that to people!”

 

His heart is hammering. He can't get a proper breath in.

 

“I'm sorry,” she blurts out.

 

He slams the brakes and they sit in silence for a few minutes.

 

“Look, I don't, you're just,” he sighs, “I know that you're curious and shit, but you can't just drop these kinds of questions on me with no warning.”

 

“I just, we, we were all talking about this stuff at our last game night. Nancy said that soulmates are bullshit. Mike thinks he's gonna get two. Dustin doesn't want to know if he has one because, and I quote, ‘science is my soulmate.’

 

“Then Jane asked Steve what he thinks about soulmates when he came by to pick up Dustin and Lucas, and, and he was so _honest_ and we didn't, I don't think he meant to share that much, but he, he gave me the strength to let Lucas know that I am glad to be his soulmate, but he is not mine.”

 

She sounded so relieved. Like she was finally able to let go of some of the weight she was carrying on her shoulders.

 

“Harrington found his soulmate?”

 

She doesn't look at him. Not directly.

 

“I'm not sure. His grandmother had a necklace made for him, but his dad's never allowed him to wear it. Something about people like them not having the luxury of a soulmate. But, he's all for them. He likes knowing that he's got someone out there who loves him more than he'll ever be able to comprehend.”

 

He feels his heart leap. But he won't give himself hope.

 

“Uh, what, what about you shitbird? How do you feel about this stuff?”

 

He sees her shrug as he starts driving again.

 

“I'm not sure what I feel about it. I _like_ Lucas. I like him despite the fact that supposedly he's not my soulmate. Mom was happy with my dad, and she seems pretty happy with Neil. Their soulmates are dead. They still have the ability to love others. And you're right, I'm just a kid. I shouldn't be worried about this stuff right now.”

 

They'd been home for almost thirty minutes before he heard static noise from her room down the hall. Nerds and their walkie talkies.

 

He just hears a few clicks and then a voice yelling “Code Green!” He heard her shuffling around and mumbling some kind of response, getting a response that he’d never make out even if his life depended on it. He hears her door sling open and then her rushed footsteps to his door, she doesn’t knock, just shoves it open and looks at him.

 

“I need a ride, please. It’s, it’s important.”

 

He really, really, really wants to tell her to fuck off. She’s got a skateboard, and a bike somewhere in the cellar. But he just shrugs and gets to his feet.

 

“What’s the big emergency?” He asks while stretching, working the kinks out of his neck.

 

“I _can’t_ tell you,” she says, looking like she wants to but isn’t sure if she should.

 

“You want a ride to some nerd herd emergency with your friends, and you can’t even tell me what for? What the hell am I supposed to say when they get home and you’re not here?”

 

She rolls her eyes but doesn’t move, “I’ll write a note. Tell them I made you take me.”

 

“Where _am_ I taking you?”

 

“The Byers’ house. The one that gave you the heebie-jeebies,” her eyes laughing at him, but she’s trying to keep a straight face.

 

“Ugh, uh, how long’s this gonna,” he pauses and stares at her, hard, “this isn’t some ploy for another one of your dorky games is it? Last time you told me some code color I got yelled at because you weren’t home, and then the time before that was, well, you know.”

 

“You can go with me for this one. I mean, nobody will be happy about it, but if it means I’m there, and plus Joyce can even call and leave a message too.”

 

He just waves her off, lead the way he non-verbally tells her.

 

It’s not that they got along better, it’s just that they’ve found that as he listened to her, taking her threat seriously--he doesn’t ever want to see that nail studded bat again--when they just tolerate each other’s existence, life is a lot smoother all around.

 

Neil doesn’t give him shit for being irresponsible and losing track of her, and Susan’s started asking him for dishes he’d like for dinner some nights. It’s not a win-win, but he’ll take what he can get.

 

He lets her direct him back to the house by the woods. He didn’t need her directions. At all.

 

He’d remembered how he got to this house. After dealing with Mrs. Wheeler, and then find his chest blooming with warmth at the sight of Steve Harrington coming down the steps from the creepy house.

 

He hates thinking about that night.

About what he did. To Steve.

To his soulmate.

 

_His_ face was bruised for weeks. Max said they were lucky _he_ wasn’t concussed. She never apologized for stealing his car after knocking him out.

 

He doesn’t think about how he walked home. How hard Neil shoved him around, or how hard Susan slapped him in the face. How dare he lose precious Maxine. Did they not realize she snuck out of her bedroom window, with the perfect ledge for doing such a thing?

He notices there’s more cars parked this time around as he pulls up. Immediately sees the truck marked Chief. Fails to ignore the red BMW parked beside an ugly looking family car. He parks behind the truck.

 

“It’s uh, it’s Steve’s birthday, and we’re having a late lunch early dinner for him,” she says with her door half open

 

“I’m pretty sure that no one in that house would want me there. Just give me a time and I’ll come back for you.”

 

“Max, you came!”

 

Billy jerked his head to the intruder. He doesn’t recognize her.

 

“Hey, El.”

 

He watches Max climb out and then as El come around the door and sits in Max’s vacated seat. She fiddles with his stereo. He notices that Max is heading towards the house sans her friend.

 

“Uh, what’s up, kid?”

 

She stops fiddling with the stereo, back on the station he’d had it on. She looks at him and tilts her head a little--like a puppy he thinks.

 

“You’re wanted.”

 

“What?”  


“You think nobody wants you inside. You’re wanted too,” she says and points at his neck. His necklace still underneath his button-up from services.

 

He shakes his head at her, “Trust me kid, no one in there wants me to come inside.”

 

She stares at him for a moment and then offers her hand, “I’m El.”

 

He looks at her hand and then her face, she’s for real. He sighs but offers his own hand and they shake.

 

“Name?” She asks. Even though he has the impression she already knows more about him than he's comfortable admitting. 

 

“Billy.”

 

She smiles and releases his hand and points to the house, “You’re a new friend now.”

He realizes that she’s not going to give up without him following her into the house. So he turns off the ignition and opens his door. She doesn’t climb out until his door is shut.

 

She smiles again. He follows.

 

He can feel his heart racing and his hands getting tingly. He can’t seem to catch a breath.

 

His entire chest blooms with warmth as he follows her into the house, closing the door behind himself.

 

The silence as all the eyes look at their newest guest tells him he was right--nobody wants him here.


	3. Wait

He really appreciates the effort of Ms. Byers asking for his help in the kitchen. It really is the poor attempt it was to keep him from overhearing the conversation in the living room.

 

That curly haired kid’s not being quiet about his opinion of Billy being here.

 

“Max says you’re into music.”

 

He shrugs, “A little.”

 

“Favorite band at the moment?”

 

“At the moment, uh, Metallica.”

 

“I love to clean house with them,” she says.

 

He’s not expecting her to say that, but from what he’s gathered of Max’s comments here and there, she’s not exactly a Susan Hargrove, or a Karen Wheeler kind of mom.

 

“I put on Queen when I clean up sometimes.”

 

She grins and goes to a radio on a shelf and hits the play button and the middle of “Crazy Little Thing Called Love” burst through the little speakers.

 

“Will found me a copy of their Greatest Hits a few years ago. I’d overplayed my first copy.”

 

He helps her with the food on the stove top, as well as chopping up veggies for a salad. He wants to tell her thank you for giving him a shot,but he also wonders if she knows what he did to Sinclair and Harrington in her own house.

He’s cutting up some cherry tomatoes when he feels her step close, “Now I’m Here,” was almost over.

 

“How come we don’t see you around when the kids get together?”

 

She was fishing. He’s been in one too many of these conversations in his life to know it’s anything but.

 

“My old man likes me to keep busy, so between running Maxine around and doing little jobs here and there, I keep busy.”

 

She looks at him, “What kind of jobs?”

 

He scoops the cut tomatoes into the bowl she’s holding with the other salad ingredients and shrugs, “Mowing lawns, raking leaves, whatever can earn a quick buck. I also started helping out on Saturdays at the auto shop twenty minutes north of here.”

 

He doesn’t like the way she’s looking at him. As if she can see every single mark Neil’s left on his face. He wonders how she knows to look for them.

 

“Oh, Old Mr. Wathen’s shop! I think he’s fixed up every single car I’ve had until even his magic touch couldn’t get it to go another mile. Is that what you want to do when you’re done with school?”

 

They both turn towards the living room where a few voices got loud. He hates the briefest flash of pity in her eyes.

 

“I uh, I can split. I know I’m not exactly welcome and crashing family gatherings really isn’t my thing.”

 

She gave him a small smile, “No, you can stay. I think it takes guts to come back here, especially given your circumstances being here the last time.”

 

“I’m really,” he stops short at her raised hand.

 

“ _Sorry_ , I know. I’ve had a talk with the kids and even Max admitted that she shouldn’t have snuck out. She’s made it clear that your father’s not exactly the warmest guy to be around.”

 

He wants to go now. He wants to breathe and smoke five cigarettes. Who is this woman?

 

“Help me with the plates while I tell them to wash up.”

 

He just stares at her, unsure of what to actually do. He knows that she knows what happened that night, all those months ago. She knows what he did. And she’s okay with him being here. What kinda shit went down to negate that?

 

He shakes his head and follows her towards the cabinets she’s opened and takes the offered plates, not bothering to count as he can hear her doing it as she hands them off.

 

When his hands and arms are full of plates, she turns to him and levels him with a stare that has him freezing in place.

 

“I’m going to say this and you’re most likely going to want to drop my plates, but please don’t, you already broke one. I know you don’t know what happened to the rest of us that night, and it doesn’t negate what you did here, but I also know what it’s like to live with a man like your father.”

 

He tenses and she can tell he’s uncomfortable.

 

“If, if you need to talk to someone who’s been there talk to me, talk to Jon, or even Hop. But I will not ever hear of you treating any of those kids like you did Lucas and Steve that night again, do I make myself clear?”

 

“Yes, ma’am. Crystal.”

 

“Good. Now put those down over by the stove and go wash up.”

 

He put the stack of plates in the empty space by the stove top on the counter and turned and walked down the hall she pointed to. He can hear the kids crammed in the bathroom, probably trying to wash all of their hands at the same time.

 

He lingers in the archway, puts his hands in his pockets and waits for the nerd herd to pass by. Only El and the smallest Byers glance at him as they pass by, both with very small smiles at him.

 

He heads towards the door they just left from and stops in his tracks. Ignores the burst of warmth that spreads through his entire body at the sight of the person in front of him.

 

“Oh, uh, my, sorry man. I’ll let you finish up,” he says as he starts to turn away.

 

“Wait!”

 

His eyes immediately meet brown and he’s frozen. He can’t move. He can’t breathe. He’s not even sure if he could blink.

 

He watches as Harrington runs a damp hand through his hair and bites his bottom lip, “Uh, thanks for bringing Max, and sticking around. I’m horrible in a kitchen. I’m sure Joyce appreciated help from someone who knows their way around one.”

 

He just nods. He’s not sure if he can actually say anything. Not with his heart hammering in his chest like it is.

 

“Are you, are you okay?” Harrington asks.

 

He nods, still not trusting his words.

 

He feels stupid just standing there watching as Harrington finally dries his hands on a towel and realizes that he’s blocking the exit of the bathroom. He hates that his first step falters as he moves backwards to let him out of the bathroom.

 

Harrington looks at him and nods once, before leaving down the hall. Billy steps back into the bathroom and busies himself with washing his hands. He looks at himself in the mirror--he looks like he saw a ghost. His face is flushed and pale at the same time, but he’s noticing that his necklace is glowing. It’s like its been illuminated from behind and he hopes that nobody knows what that means.

 

He yanks the chain off his neck and is in the midst of stuffing it in his pocket when he hears a soft gasp from the doorway--Harrington.

 

“I’m sorry, Joyce wanted me to ask, uh, I, I didn’t know they did that, what, what does it mean when they glow like that?”

 

Fuck. He shoves it deeper into his pocket, grateful that the denim is blocking his pendant light.

 

“I don’t know. It, it’s never done that before.” He is definitely an asshole.

 

Harrington bites his lip again, “I, I can call my Nana and ask her. She, she’s all about that kind of stuff.”

 

“We’re _not_ friends Harrington. No thanks. I don’t need you knowing something about me or my soulmate.”

 

He hates how harsh he sounds. He hates the flash of hurt in Harrington’s eyes more.

 

“I was just offering man, not inviting you over to braid each other’s hair and talk about boys.”

 

“What did Joyce want?”

 

“Oh, uh, what you wanted to drink. She was taking a poll on what to make.”

 

He shrugged, “I’m gonna head out actually.”

 

“Oh, you, okay, but you know you don’t, you don’t have to actually go.”

 

He scoffs, “Between you and me and everyone else in this goddamn house, no one wants me here. I’m already intruding on your birthday. I can take a hint.”

 

He dries his hands and tries to leave but is blocked by Harrington standing there with his hands on his hips.

 

“I don’t get you man, like, we’re trying to be, be nice to you and you’re just throwing it back in our faces!”

 

“Calm down Princess, and get over yourself. I don’t need you, or anyone in this house to be _nice_ to me. Look, I’m sorry. I know it’s months after the fact, but I’m sorry.”

 

“For what?”

 

“Are you for real right now? _For what?_ Did I not beat the shit out of you in the other room a few months ago? Did I not threaten one of your precious children? Just take the apology and we can get back to ignoring each other’s existence.”

 

He doesn’t like the way Harrington’s staring him down at the moment. He feels small. Not in the way Neil makes him feel inadequate, but in the way that sometimes you can’t hide what you’re feeling about the person in front of you and you’re on full display for them.

 

“Max is right, you’ve found your soulmate. _Here_.”

 

He shuts down. Lets himself go cold as ice and stares at Harrington, “ **No** . That’s _not_ up for discussion. Least of all with _you_.”

 

He shoved Harrington out of his way and stomped towards the front door, not quite slamming it behind him on his way to his car.

 

Fucking Harrington.


	4. Quantum Entanglement

“William Hargrove, _what_ did we just talk about in the kitchen? We were on the same page about behavior, so _what_ happened?”

 

He froze in his steps at Joyce's voice.

 

He was arguing with himself and she knew that he would not ignore her.

 

He turned around and shrugged, “What would you like me to say?”

 

She rolled her eyes, “Billy, I'm not stupid. You _can_ talk to me.”

 

He turned around, expecting her to be visibly upset with him, but she was just standing there, waiting for him to get himself together. She wasn’t judging him. He didn’t know what to do with that.

 

“No offense, ma’am, but I haven’t had a mom since I was ten, I don’t need one now.”

 

“You’re being very defensive over a simple question. Steve turned around to talk to you. What did he do? Or say?”

 

“Just because you’re available and offering doesn’t mean I _have_ to talk to you.”

 

He turns away from her and gets to the trunk of his car before she speaks to him again.

 

“It’s him isn’t it, he’s your soulmate.”

 

He turned around so fast, eyes wide, his heart picking up its pace, “You, you can’t, don’t,” his legs gave out and he fell.

 

She rushed to him, cupping his face in her hands. He can’t recall the last time he’d been touched like this--a mother’s touch.

 

“It’s okay, shh, it’s okay. I won’t say a word. It’s not my place.”

 

He felt her wiping his cheeks--was he crying? Shit. He was.

 

“I, I’m not, he’s, I don’t deserve him.”

 

She looked him in the eye didn’t say anything for a moment. He was finally getting himself together.

 

“That’s not your decision to make for him.”

 

He waved her off and she sat back on her knees, giving him a little bit of space.

 

“How did you know?”

She gave him a soft smile, “Sweetie, your pendant started to glow. That only happe--”

 

“I _know_ ! I know what it _means_ ! I just, _he_ doesn’t know. He’s never been allowed to see if he even has one.”

 

She presses her lips into that thin line that screams pity masqueraded as sympathy. He hated it.

 

“Okay, okay, we won’t, we won’t talk about it if you don’t want to. Would you like for me to bring you a plate of food? I can have Jim bring Max home if you’d like to have some space.”

 

“Why are you being so nice to me? Especially after what I did in your house?”

 

She cupped his cheek and he could see it in her eyes she understood.

 

“I know what it’s like to live with a man like your father. Who think they know best for everyone under their roof and has unrealistic expectations of behaviors, and talks a lot about respect and responsibility. Those kinds of men are cowards.”

 

He jerks back from her and gets to his feet. He’s uncomfortable that she can see through him. That she can relate to him.

 

“I’ll uh, I, I’ll be back. Two hours? It’d be worse for, I, it’s better if _I’m_ the one who brings her home.”

 

She nods and he hates the understanding she has in those words. He fumbles getting the keys out of his pocket and drops them on the ground.

 

“Billy, if, if you ever need to get away, you can, you can always come here. My door will always be open for you.”

 

He just nods as he finally gets into his car. His hands are shaking as he tries to put his key in the ignition and start it up.

 

He feels his eyes burn again with the threat of tears.

 

The car starts but he can’t bring himself to switch gears and drive off.

 

Everything in him is screaming at him to go find his soulmate and let him soothe what he’s feeling.

 

He hits his steering wheel and takes a few deep breaths getting everything under control. He hasn’t needed his soulmate since his mom died, he’s been _just fine_ without one so far. Just because he knows who it is doesn’t mean a thing.

He checks his mirrors, making sure Joyce isn’t still behind his car before he slams into reverse and then into drive.

 

He’s almost to the end of the driveway when he glances in his rear-view mirror and sees Steve on the porch with Joyce.

 

He’s a few turns and streets away when he reaches up to wipe his face--goddammit, he’s crying again.

 

He knows that some parents smack their kids around--consequences for breaking rules. He knows Neil is only extra rough with him because he’s not fond of Billy’s preference for boys over girls. Did Joyce’s dad beat her? No, she’d said her son’s name as someone who understood too. Her ex-husband? Was he her soulmate?

 

Billy couldn’t latch anyone to him, not with his short temper and blinding rage. He didn’t want to be like Neil.

 

He pulls off the road near some trees. Lord knows where he’s at in this town, woods are fucking everywhere.

 

He remembers one of the last conversations his Ma had had with him about his soulmate.

 

_They were curled up on her hospital bed, with a few books spread around their legs. Her arms around him, one around his shoulders, hand in his hair, brushing fingers through his unruly curls._

 

_“Do you really think there’s someone out there for me, Mama?”_

 

_She presses a kiss to his forehead, “Of course I do! With a heart as big as yours, you’re destined for someone with a heart just as big, just as giving, just as loving and caring as you are. Why do you doubt?”_

 

_Billy fiddles with the bottom hem of his shirt before looking up at her._

 

_“Some of my friends have already found theirs! JJ and Andy, they said theirs lit up the first day they met in class.”_

 

_She smiled, “Baby, you’re so young still, you don’t have to worry about this until you’re ready to. JJ and Andy are lucky to have found each other so early in life, but that doesn’t mean that when you meet yours, your life and relationship is in any way diminished because you weren’t together for years.”_

 

_“Will my pendant light up?”_

 

_“I have no doubt. Here, hand me the book by your knee.”_

 

_She smiled as she flipped to a page,_ “In the field of quantum mechanics there is something called quantum entanglement. It is what happens when two particles interact, vibrate in unison, and are separated. They remain connected by something that defies logic, something science has yet to explain. If one particle vibrates, no matter the distance, the other particle reacts in unison. Even if there are oceans between them, even if there is a universe separating them.

 

“Before time we were just a dense collection of particles confined to a space smaller than a proton, interacting and moving in unison. An event occurred that rapidly expanded the particles and created the universe. There is no reason to believe the particles ever lost their entanglement.

 

“Now, when I say I am drawn to you, that I feel I have known you since the beginning of time, know that it’s beyond my control. Know there are particles that compose me, my very fabric of being, and somewhere inside of you are the particles mine danced with millions of years ago. I’ve spent an eternity chasing that part of you.”

 

_She folded the page corner down and handed him the book, “When I went to the store to find your pendant I was drawn to it. At first I dismissed it because it looked like something your grandmother would push on you, but I kept coming back to it._

 

_“The saleslady asked me if I was doubting its call. I had to ask her what she meant. ‘You’ve walked by it seven times now.’ I had. I’d walked by it thinking there’s no way I could put that on my baby. Not when I’ve been fighting with his grandmother over religion being forced on him since she found out we were expecting._

 

_‘It’s twin was sold last year. I remember the woman who bought it, said it was for her grandson. She recognized that it was the pair of an extraordinary bond. Your child’s soulmate will love them beyond all comprehension and unconditionally. Only those with pure hearts are so lucky to get a necklace like this.’”_

 

_“I have a pure heart? Did she tell you where he lives, my soulmate?”_

 

_He felt her arms squeeze him tighter, “Baby boy, you have the purest heart of anyone I’ve ever met. And no, it’s not our choice when we meet our soulmates my love. When you’re ready, or you need him the most, or he needs you, that’s when you’ll find each other.”_

 

He hadn’t needed Steve Harrington two weeks after that conversation when she’d died. He was at school and didn’t get to say a proper goodbye.

 

Neil sold all of her books. He never could find a copy of the quote she’d read him that day. The ones he didn’t sell he just left them behind.

 

He’s never needed Steve Harrington the nights Neil’s anger gets the better of him and he turns that rage and anger onto Billy. Definitely not the night Susan dragged him to the car and then the emergency room because she feared there was going to be a dead body in their house.

 

He hasn’t needed Steve Harrington on the _worst_ days of his life, so why _now_ , why now were they being drawn together?

 

What could be going wrong in King Steve’s life that warranted the call of his soulmate? This was a small town with nothing going on.

 

What could be so bad that Steve’s soul longed for Billy’s?

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i found that quote that Mama Hargrove reads to Billy and I am in love with it. Not my words!
> 
> I do believe the next chapter turns things in a better direction for these two morons....just sayin'
> 
> Thanks for the comments and kudos! I'm glad y'all are liking this so far! Hope I'm not ruining one of my favorite AUs for y'all!


	5. Bullshit

It was 6:45 when he drove up to the Byers’ house.

 

He could see through the windows into the living room that the kids were playing something that involved them getting up and moving around.

 

He didn’t realize someone was sitting on the step until he walked around the cars and started approaching the house.

 

It was Steve.

 

And he was staring down at something in his hands. Something that was putting off a white glow.

 

He watched as Steve’s attention snapped to him at the sound of his footsteps, but he found himself freezing at the look on the other boy’s face.

 

“It only does this when I touch it. I uh, I had the others hold it just to see, but it, it’s only this bright when I, I’m the one holding it.”

 

Billy steeled himself and bit out, “Yeah, it’s meant to do so.”

 

“I, I’m _your_ , you’re, you’re _my_ soulmate?”

 

Billy bit his lip and nodded.

 

He watched Steve’s face go through an array of emotions before the other boy stood up, hand with the necklace outstretched towards Billy.

 

“I’m, I’m really sorry that you’re stuck with me,” Steve said.

 

What? Billy should be the one say that.

 

“Sorry for what?” He blurts out while taking his necklace from Steve’s hand.

 

“I’m a shitty boyfriend, and I’m not sure I’m getting into a college without the influence of my dad hanging over me, and the only friends I have are those weird, nerds inside, and you just--how come you _didn’t tell me_? You’ve had to have known since you moved here, and, and, and you didn’t, you didn’t say anything!”

 

He’s frozen at the outburst. He watches as Steve runs a hand through his hair.

 

“I didn’t think you’d appreciate the news that I’d arrived in your life. Plus I’ve managed this far in my life without the solace you’re supposed to provide me, what’s the rest of my life?”

 

Steve scoffs and puts his hands in his hips, “It’s, it’s not your goddamn choice to make! It’s mine! You knew and said nothing! You didn’t even give me a chance!”

 

“It was made very clear that Steve Harrington was off limits. You never wore a necklace and Wheeler had her claws in pretty deep. You looked so smitten. Who was I to ruin a good thing?”

 

“Jesus, Billy, I, I get my heartbroken _days_ after your arrival, called bullshit, and you, _you_ could’ve, if you’d have just _said_ something, I, you, we, _we_ could be a hell of a lot happier.”

 

“You’re hung up on the fact that my necklace lights up for you and you alone. You’re ignoring the fact that I’m no good for you, or for anyone. I’m already too much like my old man and I don’t, I can’t, I _won’t_ subject my soulmate to that for the rest of their life.”

 

Steve took a step closer to Billy and Billy tensed.

 

“That’s still a choice _I_ get a say in and you’re not letting me do it myself! You think that just because you’re an asshole of giant proportions that you can’t be loved? Newsflash dickbag, you’re an asshole! So am I!”

 

Billy looked at him. Just stared and took in his appearance.

 

“What’s so bad in your life, _King Steve_ , that you caused your soul to long and call for mine? ‘Cause from what I’ve seen, _both_ of your parents are still alive, your old man doesn’t beat the faggot out of you, so what is it?”

“Sit, and we’ll talk,” he said as he sat back down on the steps, patting the space beside him.

 

Billy sat.

 

Steve didn’t waste any time before he started talking “Monsters are real. And I almost died, not even by your hands. That fight was nothing compared to what I’ve had to deal with. Shit, me and the kids could’ve died that night. There’s legal papers signed and shit, but I don’t care anymore. Like I’m not allowed to talk about this.

 

“I was tired of being so alone and feeling worthless when it came to other people in my life. The first, the first time I fought these monsters, Nancy’s friend died. In my backyard. She’d chugged a beer and cut her finger and it smelled blood. Her blood. It came up behind her and took her away and killed her. She didn’t run away like the papers and her parents think.”

 

Billy just stared at him.He was making no sense.

 

“I thought, I thought that since my dad, he’d, he’d always told me that soulmates were not a luxury Harrington men were able to have. But my mom’s his soulmate. My Nana, she uh, she’s the one who bought my necklace. She bought it a week before she flew out for my birth. My dad never let her or my mom put it on me. I’m not, I don’t, I don’t even know where it is.

 

“I’d just hear stories about soulmates and then I realized that Nancy was not mine. She thinks they’re bullshit, but I think that’s bullshit because I’m pretty sure hers is Jonathan. He can make her smile like I never could. And she never calls him an idiot. Or bullshit.”

 

“You were desperate to find out if you had a soulmate?”

 

Steve nodded, “I guess so. I, I’m, I’m tired of being so lonely.”

 

“Does it bother you that it’s me?”

 

“No.”

 

There was pause, no hesitation. Billy looked him in the eye and saw that he was being honest.

 

“Harri-- _Steve_ , I, I'm sorry about everything that I did to you,” Billy said. His voice cracking with his emotions.

 

“Uh, Joyce, she tore me a new one. I uh, I came out when I heard your car start. She just turned around and started going off on me.”

 

Billy watched as the other boy fidgeted with his hands, twisting and turning his fingers into and over one another. He, himself, was toying with his pendant.

“She uh, she has that mom look, where you can’t help but spill your guts and I, I just started blurting out that I was sorry, it was my fault. I, I’d chased you away and I should go after you, but then they threw me this wonderful surprise dinner, and I ruined your evening. I ruined it by being me, and I’m sorry.”

 

“Can you stop apologizing? It’s unnecessary man.”

 

Steve just looked at him. Staring him down, like he was trying to figure him out. Good luck with that.

 

“I, I’m why you’re here? In Hawkins?”

 

Billy shrugged, “I don’t know, things happen. Soulmate shit is weird. And the old man followed the wishes of his new wife. She wanted a fresh start for their new family and here we are.”

 

Steve looks down at Billy’s hands, the pendant dangling between fingers, “What did it feel like when you first got here?”

 

Billy choked on air and coughed.

 

How did it feel? He almost crashed into a guard rail the first time he felt its temperature change. Neil had laid into him when they stopped for a bite to eat. Susan didn’t say a word, but she kept glancing down at his pendant.

 

The first time it glowed, or he realized it was glowing, was when he came to after their fight at the Byers’. He doesn’t think he shed that many tears since his mom died.

 

“You really’ve never worn yours? Never even _seen_ it? _Touched_ it?”

 

He watched Steve shake his head.

 

“Uh, well, the stories are true about it changing temperature the closer you get, and uh, obviously on some level, the few who can draw light with their match, well, I guess, I guess is true.”

 

He doesn’t like the way Steve’s looking at him.

 

“You’ve always doubted this, haven’t you?” Steve asked.

 

Billy doesn’t know what to say. _No_ , at least not until his Ma died and Neil could remarry some other woman who wasn’t his soulmate.

 

“Yeah, but, uh, not, not until after my, my Mom died.”

He realizes that this is the first time he’s ever said that _out loud_ to someone who was not his own reflection in a mirror.

 

“The saleslady at the store my Ma got this from, she uh, she sold your Nana your necklace too. I remember my Ma telling me about it. Said that whoever we were, we were lucky to have each other.”

 

“Nana, would love to meet you, I think. No, I know she would. She’s probably threaten my dad with a spanking and a thousand ‘I told you so’s’. She’d always tell me that my soulmate would have a pure heart.”

 

Billy doesn’t know why, but the quote his mom read to him popped into his head. _Now, when I say I am drawn to you, that I feel I have known you since the beginning of time, know that it’s beyond my control. Know there are particles that compose me, my very fabric of being, and somewhere inside of you are the particles mine danced with millions of years ago. I’ve spent an eternity chasing that part of you._

 

“What?” Steve asked, “You mumbled something and I couldn’t quite make it out.”

 

Billy felt himself flush with embarrassment.

 

“You said pure heart and it reminded me of something my Ma would read to me all the time, about my soulmate.”

 

“Can you tell me?”

 

He meets Steve’s eyes and doesn’t understand why he has the urge to recite the whole quote, but he’s also got the urge to tell Steve to fuck off. He hates the hope in those brown eyes.

 

“ _Know there are particles that compose me, my very fabric of being, and somewhere inside of you are the particles mine danced with millions of years ago. I’ve spent an eternity chasing that part of you._ ”

 

“That, that’s really, that’s beautiful.”

 

Billy got to his feet and stretched.

 

“Yeah, but it doesn’t mean anything. It doesn’t have to,” he says.

 

Steve looks up at him, brows furrowing, “Why won’t you let yourself be happy?”

 

Billy scoffs, “That’s fucking rich coming from you. I’ve endured a lot of shit without the solace of  a soulmate and I’m fairly certain my soul screamed for yours, but I’ve survived this far without you.”

 

Steve stands up, putting himself into Billy’s space.

 

“You don’t think I’ve ever wanted a soulmate? That, that I just think one’s worthless? Shit man, like, you don’t even know the half of it! I watched as my friends found theirs as early as kindergarten for Tommy and Carol, and more throughout the school years. I tried to make it work with Nancy because I believed her thinking it was all bullshit until I noticed her starting to hang out with Jonathan.

 

“The, the one person that I thought I could swallow the pill of never finding my own soulmate, ends up calling me bullshit and finding hers in the process. At least I can admit when I’m an asshole, you just act like one to keep everyone else away. You act all tough but I bet you’re alone and you hate it.”

 

“Don’t act like you know me just because you found out we’re soulmates.”

 

Steve grabbed the hand holding the pendant, it was warm and still giving off the white light. “This, _this_ tells me that you feel it too. That I am not bullshit. That you’re more than just an asshole. But if this is _your_ choice, let me make _mine_ perfectly clear--you walk away right now, you will _never_ understand how much I’ve wanted you, how much I’ve loved you, and would love you for the rest of our lives. I didn’t care who my soulmate was, I was elated to just _know_ that I had one.”


	6. Stupid

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> mmkay...soooo....this one might seem like a doozy 'cause it is....but i promise it should get better from here....okie dokie?
> 
>  
> 
> again, thank you so much for the fondness y'all have for this little thing i'm spewing out. i really do appreciate it all!  
> i always go with M ratings 'cause sometimes i'm not sure if i want to take things up a notch, but i give myself some wiggle room to do so...eh, it's not my forte to write, but sometimes the mood strikes me, ya dig? 
> 
> don't read the note at the end before reading this chapter unless you want to be spoiled!

* * *

 

“Are you sure this is what you want to do? I, I can't help you anymore if you do this, Billy.”

 

He nods, meeting Susan's eyes. She gives him a sad look before nodding herself.

 

He watches her turn and walk out of the kitchen into the dining room they've never used.

 

He can hear her shifting things around and when she returns to the kitchen she has an envelope in her hands. Thicker than he ever expected.

 

“I'm, Billy, you, you let me know when you're settled.”

 

He hears her unspoken apology. Those three words he hasn't heard since his Mama died.

 

“It's not much,” she starts, “I, I've kept my word. I split it in half between you and Max. I also took what I could from your father when he wouldn't notice. It's about two thousand.”

 

“Susan,” he says but she shakes her head.

 

“I'm the one who is sorry. I think it's better for you that you're going. He can't, if he doesn't know where to find you, he can't hurt you anymore.”

 

“What about you and Max?”

 

“He knows better than to touch a hair on her head. Besides, if he ever does, _accidents_ happen in the woods sometimes. Don't you worry about us.”

 

“I'm sorry that I never gave you a chance.”

 

She gives him a watery smile, “I know. I am too. I put three of my suitcases on your bed. I got what I could from the cellar. Grab the box in the back closet, it, it has your mother's things inside.”

 

He feels all the air leave his lungs and tries to catch a breath.

 

“I'm going to go to the grocery store, that way I have no idea when you left.”

 

“Thanks, Susan. For, for all this.”

 

She turns to the door and as she opens it she turns to look at him, “I'm, I know that part of you is doing this to get away from your father, but I'm, Billy, if _any_ part of this is because you're running from your soulmate, reconsider.

 

“I made my peace with my own soulmate's death, but I, I couldn't handle living on knowing that they were out there and _chose_ to walk away from me.”

 

“He doesn't want me.”

 

He hates the sound of her sucking in a breath.

 

“I'm sorry.”

 

Her eyes water and she continues out the door. It closes quietly behind her, but that soft click is the loudest noise.

 

At least she didn't acknowledge his lie.

 

He takes a few deep breaths and looks at the clock, he's got a good few hours before Max gets out of school and Neil gets home from work, but by then he's hoping to be close to the border headed west.

 

He goes to his room, and stops in the doorway-- _she_ put all of his clothes in one of the suitcases for him. He notices an envelope with his name on it, in his mother's hand.

 

He wants to read it but he knows that he doesn't have the time for that kind of distraction. Susan was a little surprised by him coming home early, but she wasn't surprised by his reasoning for wanting to leave.

 

He packs up the rest of his things, slamming the suitcases closed and lugging them out into the hallway. He takes them directly to his car, tossing them into the trunk. He gets the box next, not opening it up. Still can't afford distractions.

 

He doesn't know if anyone saw him leaving school, but he knows that his car was heard as he peeled off towards the house.

 

He's standing over the trunk, his pendant in hand, dangling from its chain, when he hears the approaching footsteps. He let's the necklace fall in the small crevice atop the box and slams the trunk shut.

 

“You're a goddamn _coward_!”

 

Fuck. It's Steve.

 

But he didn't need the other boy to say anything. He noticed that his pendant started to glow before dropping it into the box.

 

He kept his hands on his car, back to Steve. He _desperately_ wants to turn around and face him, but he _can't._

 

“Yeah, and _you_ can't take a goddamn hint.”

 

He hears and _feels_ Steve step closer.

 

“I'm _ignoring_ your hint. I don't agree with it. You're being very stupid about this.”

 

_Everything_ inside of him wants to turn around and look at Steve.

 

He shakes his head, still refusing to give Steve his full attention.

 

“I'm going with you,” Steve says.

 

Billy jerks around and everything goes out of him. He takes in Steve's appearance and he doesn't know what to do with it.

 

“You, you look how I feel.”

 

He watches him shrug, “Then you know how big of an asshole you're being right now. You just ran away yesterday, and today I had to hear from _gossip_ that you were going to run.

 

“I'm, I don't think you understand what I was saying to you yesterday. I have done nothing but _hope_ that my soulmate would show up one day and then, then I'd know what it felt like to be loved.

 

“But you came into my life like a hurricane and you were going to leave me with the devastating wreckage. I, _Billy,_ now that I know, I, I'm going to fight for you. I am going to prove to you that you're not alone.

 

“But mostly, I am going to prove to you that you're so much _more_ than you've ever been told you are. If I have to follow you around the world, I will.”

 

He shoves Steve away and takes a few steps away himself.

 

“You have no idea what you're doing here. You're not, you don't, you're hung up on the _idea_ of what I mean. But if, if you knew _me_ , you, you'd know that you're better off without me.”

 

Steve just _stares_ at him. Eyes going glossy with the build up of unshed tears.

 

“You're going to California aren't you?”

 

“No.”

 

“Don't lie to me!”

 

Billy raises his hands in mock surrender and watches the tears fall from Steve's eyes and his chest heave as he tries to breathe.

 

He wants to reach out and _soothe_ his pain. Wants to tuck him into his arms and hold on and never let go.

 

But he doesn't. He just stares and feels his own heart shattering. His heart was hammering. His own fingertips desperate to touch Steve in return.

 

“I'm sorry.”

 

He says it no louder than a whisper, but he knows that Steve heard him.

 

“ _Fine_. If, I, I've,” he tries to breathe, “I'm not letting you leave without me knowing what it's like to kiss you.”

 

Billy had no warning. Steve didn't hesitate about getting back in his space and cradling Billy's head in his hands and pressing his lips to his.

 

The moment their lips touched Billy felt warmth blossom throughout his entire body. He felt that he had been waiting his _whole life_ for this moment.

 

His cheek and jaw tingled where Steve's fingertips were touching.

 

He doesn't even fight to allow Steve's tongue entrance as it kicks along the seam of his lips. The _taste_ of _Steve_ bursting into his mouth is overwhelming and he finally gets his hands on the other boy.

 

One fist caught in stands of hair. The other tugging him closer by his shirt.

 

He can't keep up with the onslaught of stimuli--his own emotions, his hands _on_ Steve, _Steve's_ hands on him. The way their bodies just slotted together and are moving in complimentary shadows of the other. It's a perfect balance of give and take.

 

They both pull away at the same time, gasping for breath and eyes locked.

 

He can feel each puff of Steve's breaths as he exhales.

 

He is blinded by the smile that blooms on his soulmate's face.

 

“I, if you still have to go, it's, I'm okay now.”

 

“Don't lie to me,” Billy says, taking in the emotions flickering through the brown eyes still looking into his blues.

 

“I'm, I, I've, I can go with you.”

 

“You can't and you know that.”

 

He can _see_ the fury in his eyes.

 

“ _Stop_ making choices for me! I'm not asking you to marry me, I'm just asking you to get to know me before you write me off completely.”

 

Billy doesn't know what to say.

 

“You're headed west, and I have family out there. I don't, I just want to go. With you. My, I, at least meet my Nana. Please?”

 

Billy gives a slight nod, “On one condition Pretty Boy, as soon as we're done visiting your grandmother, you go home.”

 

He doesn’t know why he agreed to let Steve go with him. He knows part of him is curious as to what Nana’s going to think of him as Steve’s soulmate. He just hopes they can survive the two days it’s going to take to get there.

 

“Deal,” Steve says, holding his hand out for a shake.

 

He takes and shakes on the deal.

 

Steve’s smile is blinding.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i did not intend for them to kiss in this chapter it just, that's just how things happened whilst i was writing...
> 
> that being said, they're not just going to fall into bed together 'cause i'm not about that life...plus, with how things are going in my head as i write this, it wouldn't be fitting for them and they deserve better than a quick wham, bam, thank you man. 
> 
> next chapter will most likely just be their two days in the car (i gauged the drive from indanapolis to san francisco = 35 hours or so)...mostly 'cause i am excited about Nana and Billy meeting...but that could just be me...


	7. Naturally (Part 1)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> um, yes, hello, it's me...
> 
> terribly sorry that i'm like almost a month away from the last update...uh, life happened...
> 
> so without further ado...here is the next bit...which i'd planned to be just one chapter about their little trip west, but that's not the case...

* * *

 

He wasn't sure what he was expecting being in a car with his, technically, mostly-still-a-stranger, soulmate, but it wasn't this.

 

It wasn't hours of talking about anything and everything without keeping track of time. Or the laughing that came so naturally between them.

 

He's realizing that he's seriously underestimated the kind of guy Steve Harrington is.

 

Their tastes in music are very different, but they were able to find common ground. Who knew Pretty Boy was into Def Leppard?

 

Before either of them had realized it Steve had pointed out an exit that advertised gas, food, and hotels. Billy let's him choose a place to eat--a truck stop that looks busy, which can go both ways on a road trip.

 

He parks in a spot, opting to top off his tank in the morning.

 

He sits, watching Steve climb out and stretch. He catches a glimpse of the line of skin as the other boy's shirt rises. He knows he was caught staring when Steve ducks down.

 

"You comin' or what?"

 

"Yeah," he says a little flat.

 

He doesn't know how to interpret the look on Steve's face.

 

Once he's out and on his own feet he too lets his body stretch. It felt good after being cooped up in the car for hours.

 

He's aware of Steve's presence immediately. He's hovering on the edge of too close and awkwardly too far away. He can tell that the other boy is nervous. He doesn't know why.

 

He leads them into the restaurant, and right towards the hostess stands. The older lady leaning against it has him momentarily stunned. In another life she could be his mother--had she lived.

 

"Hello fellas, welcome to Lee's, you want a table or booth?"

 

Billy shrugs and glances at Steve who says, "Booth, please."

 

She keeps her smile and says to follow her. She leads them through a maze of tables and booths to the far wall and puts their menus on a table.

 

"Your server will be with you in a moment, enjoy fellas."

 

They sit down and in seconds they both realize they are now facing each other instead of being side-by-side with the road as a distraction.

 

"Smells amazing here," Steve says as he glances around.

 

Billy shrugs, "I guess. I think it's 'cause we're hungry."

 

"Know what you're going to get?"

 

He shakes his head.

 

"Oh, aren't we a handsome pair! Hello boys, name's Agnes and I'll be taking care of you today. Can I get you a drink?"

 

"I'll have a chocolate milkshake please, and he'll have a Coke. Thank you."

 

Billy doesn't quite stare at Steve, but he nods in confirmation when Agnes looks at him. He was not prepared for Steve to just take over.

 

"You got it. Any appetizers for you? Or would like some more time?"

 

"A basket of fries would be amazing to start with."

 

Billy just sits there, watching Steve and Agnes. How easy it is to just sit there and let Steve take care of the current situation.

 

He feels like he should be surprised, but he's not. Not really.

 

"I, uh, I'm sorry. I'm, I didn't mean to just take over like that," Steve blurts out once Agnes is a few tables away.

 

"It's fine."

 

"Don't go quiet on me now, we were doing great in the car! I, I'm, I mean, we're hours from home and only had to stop twice before here. I, I didn't think you'd mind if I was able to show you that I pay attention to you. To what you say."

 

Billy can feel his face heating up, "I said it's fine."

 

Steve stares and Billy doesn't like it.

 

He takes a deep breath, "Look man, I already told you I'm letting you tag along because you want to see your Nana. However, I meant it when I said that when that visit's over, you're on a bus or plane back home."

 

"And I told you that I was going to use the limited time I have with you to prove that I am worthy of you."

 

Billy will never understand why Steve thinks _he_ 's the unworthy one. But he doesn't ask for clarification because he really doesn't want to know why Harrington thinks so little of himself. He's heard the rumors about his parents--work conferences, vacations, just not wanting to be around him, he was an accident.

 

Regardless of why his parents seem to be gone often, Billy thinks that's a lonely life. He knows that when Neil and Susan first started living together, they'd go on weekend dates and would often arrange for Max to stay at a friend's. He was on edge the whole time. He'd never gotten to experience that in Hawkins, and now that he's leaving, he's not sure if he could willingly send his soulmate back to that kind of existence.

 

"And you haven't even heard a word I just said," Steve says with a smile.

 

He _should_ feel embarrassed but he's _not_.

 

"I was thinking about you."

 

He likes the way the other boy flushes and sinks into the booth. He does have the fleeting thought that if this were to work out in his favor, his soulmate would be beautiful to watch as they grew old together. Especially when he bites his lip when he's embarrassed, and then runs a hand through his hair, looking everywhere but at Billy.

 

"I'm sorry," he says, leaning towards Steve, resting his arms on the table, "I, you, you throw me off my game. You were saying?"

 

"My Nana, I, I can give her a call and let her know we'll arrive sometime tomorrow. She can have rooms prepared for us."

 

"You don't have to make an old lady make up bedrooms, we can do that when we get there."

 

He doesn't know why Steve's cheeks tinge pink.

 

"Uh, no, not, she wouldn't be, she has staff that would prep for our arrival."

 

"Staff? As in your grandma has help, like _the help_? Shit, Harrington, your grandma's that rich?"

 

"It's a family thing if you haven't noticed."

 

"Is it your thing?" Billy asks him, suddenly more serious than they've been the entire trip so far.

 

He watches Steve mull over the question but he can tell before he says anything he's going to say no.

 

"Not really, no. I, I don't and haven't ever seen myself turning into my dad. I, I really don't like the idea of bringing up a kid or two in the way I was. It was lonely. It still is."

 

"You want more than one kid?"

 

That's not what he meant to focus on. At all.

 

"I mean, I, I know I want one for sure. I just, I, I never," Steve sighs, "do, would, do _you_ want kids?"

 

Billy doesn't even hesitate, "I've never actually thought about it."

 

Steve nods, "I, I can get that. Is, is it something you could?"

 

The _now_ didn't have to be said.

 

He'd like to say that so long as it wasn't his sperm going in for the count he wouldn't mind. He doesn't want to chance passing on any of Neil's genetic personality traits. Instead he just shrugs in response.

 

"I guess. It's something I'd have to really take some time to consider. In case you failed to notice, I'm not exactly a contender for potential father of the year material."

 

"You're too hard on yourself."

 

"Takes one to know one."

 

Steve just smiles and nods.

 

Agnes brings their basket of fries and drinks and takes their order. Steve orders for him again.

 

She looks between them and smiles, "Your bond is beautiful. You're lucky you found each other."

 

They both blush as red as the plastic cups on the table in front of them.

 

"Oh, it's new! How sweet! Congrats fellas!"

 

"Uh, actually, no, uh, we're, we're not," Steve tries to tell her.

 

"Baby, if the way you look at him is _any_ indication, you _are_."

 

Steve looks away, cheeks turning darker.

 

"It's complicated, ma'am," Billy tries.

 

She smirks, "Complicated my ass sweetie! He looks at you like my Lee used to look at me. I could piss that man off, did actually, daily, and he'd still look at me like I hung the moon and stars. Stop fighting it."

 

Steve still refused to look back at Billy.

 

"This was his pride and joy, and I hated it," she continued, "Now though, it's all I have left of 'im. Well, except our three kids, but they're off living their own lives. Sometimes the best relationships start off as friendships."

 

She smiled at them both, "I'll go put your orders in," and she was gone again.

 

"I, I'll go see if I can make that call," Steve said and then he too was gone.

 

Billy watched him walk off towards the hostess stand.

 

A beautiful bond? How could she tell? His pendant was still in the box in the trunk.

 

He remembers his Ma always telling him about his soulmate. Or the kind of person she wanted his soulmate to be. He knows that if she were still here, she'd absolutely adore Harrington.

 

And call him an idiot for fighting it.

 

He watched Steve walk back to their booth, he looked a little embarrassed as he sat back down.

 

"She, she's uh, she's _excited_ to meet you."

 

"It's going to be horrible isn't it?"

 

Steve huffed a little laugh, "You have no idea what you're in for. I am so sorry. Terribly sorry. In advance."

 

"She can't be that bad, Pretty Boy."

 

"You said it, not me. When she gets to be too much just remember this moment. I will hold it against you."

 

"You must mean a lot to her to just open her house up for a complete stranger."

 

"I'm, I'm her first grandchild. She tells me that she learned how to fully love unconditionally the moment I was placed in her arms."

 

"My grandmas just send me birthday cards every year. They're never actually on my birthday. Always three months late. I haven't seen either of them since I was seven."

 

That seemed to open up another flow of conversation for them.

 

Billy's not sure how long they sat together in that booth. Agnes brought their food out and refilled their drinks. She'd just smile.

 

It wasn't until he noticed that Steve was yawning a lot more frequently that he suggested they go find a place with vacancy to settle down for the night.

 

They both left more than enough for an adequate tip for Agnes on their table.

 

Steve asked the hostess if she recommended any of the hotels in the area and she directed them to one three miles down the main strip.

 

Billy easily found the place of recommendation and inwardly laughed to himself. He'd bet Agnes told the hostess about her thoughts on the two of them. He could tell that Steve was having the same kind of reaction to the place. It looked more bed and breakfast like than a hotel or motel. Oh well, a bed was a bed, and they had the longest haul of their trip tomorrow. The desert felt never-ending when driving through it.

 

He grabbed the duffel he'd thrown in his backseat just for the quick stay he'd planned originally. He noticed Harrington grab a backpack.

 

"I can see if we can swing separate rooms?"

 

"If that's what you want to do, that's find with me," Steve said.

 

Billy didn't, or couldn't, respond to that so he just headed towards the entrance.

 

The lobby was welcoming but it definitely solidified his theory on Agnes telling the hostess what she thought about him and Steve.

 

"Hello, you must here on Carol's suggestion. Agnes called, said I'd be getting a pair of handsome fellas coming by for the night."

 

"What the hell kind of town is this?"

 

"Sorry, they don't get many customers outside of truckers and families on road trips. I do have a room with two twins if that'll do for you?"

 

Billy looked at the name tag, "It'll do, Fred."

 

Billy made sure his tone told Fred there would be no further discussion, just the transaction of paying for the room and getting the key.

 

"Room 8 is upstairs to the left. If you don't want the sun to wake you, I'd be sure to close the curtains before going to bed."

 

Billy just nodded and turned back around, and noticed that Steve had lingered by the door.

 

"We're upstairs to the left."

 

As they climbed the stairs, Billy could feel his nerves fluttering and wondered if Steve was feeling the same.

 

When he finally unlocked and pushed their room's door open he was relieved to see two separate beds.

 

He let Steve enter first, opting to claim the first shower.

 

He made quick work of his clothes and turned on the water. Once he was under the spray he let out the breath he'd been holding--figuratively.

 

As he washed and rinsed he had the sudden realization that he'd originally planned to be traveling solo--he sleeps in nothing but his underwear.

 

Dammit.


	8. Naturally (Part 2)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uh, here's some 4k words...i hope y'all like this update!

* * *

 

With his hand on the door he took a deep breath and left the bathroom. 

 

The first thing he noticed was that Harrington had chosen the bed closest to the window, of which he was looking out of, his back to Billy. 

 

Taking advantage of the other boy’s attention not being on him, he quickly tossed his bag on the floor and climbed under the bedding. However, the moment his body weight registered with the bed it squeaked and Steve immediately turned around.

 

They both froze as they stared at each other.

 

“Uh, the shower’s free,” Billy blurted out.

 

He watched Steve’s eyes glance over his body and suddenly felt self-conscious about being in his boxers. At least they weren’t briefs; he likes a little breathing room at night for his fellas.

 

He realizes that there’s only a few feet between their beds, the width of the flimsy looking nightstand holding a lamp and a little notepad with a pen. 

 

“I, I prefer to shower in the morning if you don’t mind.”

 

Billy had no idea why he was still frozen in place. 

 

“It’s whatever, man.”

 

“Steve.”

 

He finally sits down, “What?”

 

“Steve. My name is Steve. You can use it.”

 

He doesn’t know what to do with that. Let alone how to interpret the tone of voice.

 

“Good night, Steve.”

 

He knows it’s a cop-out. Blurting out good night and then quickly maneuvering his body to lay down facing  _ away  _ from the other boy.

 

Harrington doesn’t say anything but Billy can hear him start to rummage through his bag and then he hears the distinct sound of clothes being taken off of a body. 

 

He fights the immediate urge in him to watch the other boy undress. He’s done it countless times in the locker room at school, but he knows that this, here and now, it would be  _ different _ .

So he closes his eyes tight and focuses on the scratchy material of the blanket covering him. 

 

He hears the other bed squeak as Steve climbs in, and then again as he shifts around and then Billy hears the click of the lamp being turned off. 

 

He can feel the other boy’s eyes on his back for a long time. It’s oddly comforting to him. He’s finally found his soulmate and this is the first time they’re sleeping in the same room together. 

 

When he wakes up the next morning he notices immediately that he’s alone. The other bed was made up as if Harrington never even slept in it. 

 

He also realizes that this was the first night he’d slept peacefully. He wasn’t restless like he usually is. He actually felt rested as he got up and stretched. 

 

As he glanced around once more, he noticed the notepad had been moved to Billy’s bag.

 

_ You looked peaceful, I didn’t want to wake you. I’m downstairs taking advantage of the free breakfast buffet. -Steve _

 

Shit, free breakfast? How had he missed that? Oh right, apparently those old ladies at the diner had matchmaking schemes to plan and Fred just let them walk all over him. 

 

He gets dressed slowly, knowing that Harrington’s not going to just barge in. He glances at the clock by the door, it’s quarter to nine, they’d make great time today.

 

Steve’s Nana lives in the outskirts of the city. He recognized the area when the other boy told him where to go because he and his friends would joy ride on those twisty roads. 

 

He double checks the room to make sure that neither he or Harrington, Steve--he should get used to saying his name, left anything behind.

 

He shoulders his duffel bag and headed out the room and downstairs.

 

As he descended the stairs he could hear voices coming from somewhere below. 

 

“Good morning, sir, if you’re looking for your companion, he’s just down the hall to the right. Breakfast is still available for another hour.”

 

He glanced at the lady behind the counter but followed her directions into a spacious room set up like a dining area. 

 

He immediately spotted Steve. He was drinking a cup of coffee, looking out the window. He’d recognize that head of hair anywhere if he were being honest. 

 

“Mornin’ Princess.”

 

He will forever enjoy the little jump Steve did at his greeting.

 

“Asshole! I could’ve spilled this!”

 

“But you didn’t,” Billy said as he took the chair across the table from Steve; “What’s good to eat?”

 

Steve looked down at his plate and then up at Billy, “The eggs are heavenly, if you like scrambled. The bacon could be a little crispier but it’s not too bad. The sausage links are the safer bet between them and the patties. There’s also cereal if you’re not looking for a hot breakfast. And lots of fruit.”

 

Billy nodded and glanced around the room--twelve tables ranging in size and number of chairs surrounding them. The warm food was set up nicely on a buffet against the wall, and another table had a mini fridge with options for cereal, yogurt, and what looked like toast or bagels. 

 

“How’d you sleep?”

 

Steve choked on his coffee, “What? I’m sorry, uh, I, fine.”

 

“I can’t take you anywhere, can I?” Billy said with a smile. 

 

“Oddly, it’s the best sleep I’ve had in a long time.”

 

Billy didn’t want to say me too, but he was thinking it. He nodded towards the food and got up.

 

As he scooped some eggs onto his plate, he felt someone come up to him and he tensed.

 

“You’re with that handsome young man in the corner aren’t you? Oh you two just light up around each other, it’s beautiful! I saw you look for him, like you were drawn to him regardless of where he’d be in a room, you’d just know where to look to find him.”

 

Billy felt his face flush--felt it go to his ears and down his neck. He felt his chest bloom with embarrassed warmth too.

 

“Uh, no offense ma’am, but I’d like to just get some food and be left alone.”

 

He didn’t even let her continue, he just left with his plate of eggs and bacon and crossed back to their table.

 

“Were you bombarded with questions and comments about how people think we’re just so fucking adorable?”

 

He didn’t mean to spit out as roughly as he did. Nor did he mean to slam his plate on the table, rattling the dishes.

 

Steve just looked up at him and nodded, “Yeah. Is it always like that? People always asking questions about this stuff?”

 

Billy just nodded as he stuffed a bite of the eggs in his mouth. Shit, Steve was right, they were pretty good. 

 

Steve met his eyes and then looked away; “I hated the looks that people would give me when they realized that I wasn't wearing a pendant. It's, it was like they were pitying me and I didn't know why.

 

“Sometimes, some people who, uh, when we'd fool around, I could tell that they were looking for something and they were always a little disappointed when they didn't find anything. 

 

“Like they were desperate and hoping that  _ they  _ would be  _ my _ soulmate. I never, I thought it would never happen to me. My dad's been very adamant about the fact that I wouldn't get the luxury of my soulmate. 

 

“I kinda wonder if he knew that it'd be a guy. Mom's never cared about the people I brought around, but dad always had something to say if it was a guy. He'd hate you, but I think, I think my mom would adore you. She'd definitely be jealous of your hair.”

 

Billy was just watching the other boy as he rambled. He knows that he'd probably have words with Steve's old man if he ever met him.

 

“I think that I always knew that I had a soulmate out there. I just never thought that, that I'd ever get to meet them. You. Meet  _ you _ .

 

“Nana would tell me all sorts of stories about soulmates and what they mean to people. When I was younger and she visited more often, she would always tell me that my soulmate was special. 

 

“That, that he'd have his mother's heart. It will be so pure and unrelenting in the love it will give. And, and the first time that I ever saw him, I would know. 

 

“And I did. I didn't need a pendant to tell me that there was something about you that night at Tina's. I didn't need to be holding  _ your  _ pendant in my hands to know why it glows. 

 

“I, I  _ hated  _ the fight we had at the Byers’ house that night. I never, I didn't, I didn't want to hurt you. I  _ felt  _ it the moment our eyes met. I knew that my soul had been calling for  _ you.  _

 

“But I, I, I couldn't let you treat my kids like that. Not, not Lucas, and definitely not because of the color of his skin. Max is his soulmate, and he knew from the beginning that he wasn't hers, but he did not want to know what life would be like if he never had a moment with her.

 

“Shit, Billy, they're just kids and they're all smarter than I will ever be. But if, if he could have that courage, to live with the fact that he would have a soulmate that would have another, and still be okay with the time he gets with her, why, why can't we do the same? 

 

“I know what you think about me, and I don't know what I will do when this is over, but can, I, I, I, can you please give me a chance to, to know you? To have a taste of what we could be?”

 

Steve sighs and Billy can only stare. He watches him run a hand through his hair, looking out the window.

 

“I'm sorry, Billy. This is entirely unfair of me to ask of you.”

 

Steve gets up from the table, backpack in hand and bolts from the room. 

 

Billy is frozen in his seat.

 

His food is a waste now. His appetite is gone.

 

_ I know what you think about me.  _ No, no Pretty Boy, you don't. 

 

It takes him a lot longer than he wants it to to get himself together. He scrambles to get to his feet, shoulders his duffel and darts in the direction Steve went. 

 

He shoves through the front door and goes out to the sidewalk and looks in both directions. There's no sight of Steve. 

 

This is a bustling town, but there's not a lot of people out here. 

 

He doesn't realize it, but he's started to call out his name.

 

He wanders in both directions from the bed and breakfast, backtracking a few times. 

 

He went into each open business to see if Steve was inside. 

 

When he heard church bells ringing, he realized that it was probably noon. He'd been wandering around for hours looking for Steve. 

 

He treks back to his car. Slams the trunk shut once he throws his bag in. 

 

He tugs at his hair  trying to find out what words he's going to say to Max about losing Steve in the middle of nowhere. 

 

“Dude, you need to calm down!”

 

Billy’s head shot up and he glanced into the backseat of his car--how did he not realize the back windows were cracked? But there sat Steve Harrington.

 

He pointed his finger, “You are a goddamn asshole! Do you have any idea what I just spent the last few hours doing?”

 

He didn’t let Steve get a word in.

 

“I walked blocks of this fucking town looking for you! I had no idea where you went, you just disappeared and all I could think to do was go and find you.”

 

He took a few deep breaths and watched as Steve climbed into the front seat and then out of the car. He could feel his heart hammering. 

 

Steve walked around the car and approached Billy but he just shoved him away. He tried again and Billy just shoved him harder.

 

“No!”

 

“I’m sorry.”

 

Billy felt everything just go out of him--his anger, his panic--and just stared at Steve.

 

“You’re wrong.”

 

Steve looked confused, “About being sorry? I’m pretty sure that I know how I feel.”

 

Billy just shook his head and nodded towards the car, “Get in and let’s go. We’ve got hours to make up for now.”

 

He didn’t wait for Steve to buckle up before he pulled out of the parking lot and onto the main road, looking for signs for the highway. 

 

Any time Steve tried to open his mouth to say something Billy would just turn the stereo up louder. 

He stopped to fill up once they hit Arizona. He hadn’t realized they stayed in Texas until he saw the ‘Welcome to New Mexico sign.’ 

 

He tossed a twenty at Steve and told him to get some drinks and snacks, they were going to make it to San Diego today.

 

He filled up and headed in to pay for his gas when he noticed that the cashier was flirting with Steve. And Steve was letting him. 

 

With a hot flash of what he will deny is jealousy he walked up to the counter and tossed an arm around Steve, “Add pump 3 to the total please.”

 

Steve didn’t flinch, but he didn’t melt into Billy’s side either. The cashier glanced between them and made a face, one that Billy could tell he wasn’t buying what was being projected in front of him.

 

“That’ll be ten-sixty-five for everything.”

 

Steve held out the twenty Billy’d given him and watched as the cashier deliberately made their fingers touch. 

 

“He looks a lot out of your league amigo,” the cashier said, glancing at Billy.

 

“Amigo? Is that a thing you people say out here?” Steve asked.

 

“Sure is pretty boy, I take it you’re not from around here. Nah, not with that creamy skin of yours. Too bad you’re just passing through, I would offer to show you around.”

 

Billy glanced at the name tag, but before he could spit out any of his jealousy, Steve beat him to it.

 

“Dave, I’m flattered. You made my day, but see this fella right here, uh, we’re soulmates and it’s kinda new. He’s very much the jealous type.”

 

Billy felt his ears burn in embarrassment. But he kept a small smirk on his face as Steve gathered the bag of snacks from the counter and nudged Billy to move towards the door. 

 

Steve didn’t say anything as they left the shop and walked towards Billy’s car. He didn’t say anything as they both climbed in and Billy started driving again. 

 

Billy wanted to say something. Anything really. They’d started out great, talking non-stop about everything and anything. 

 

But it was getting real now. They both were understanding that implication. 

 

They were soulmates. 

 

That meant something.

 

Billy couldn’t take the silence for more than an hour and a half. He promptly pulled over and parked on the shoulder, which wasn’t really a shoulder, it was just desert.

 

“That, that was the first time you acknowledged what we are to each other. And it was to some dude who would’ve wanted nothing from you but to get in your pants.”

 

“I know.”

 

Billy squeezed the steering wheel, “ _ I know _ . The fuck are you, twelve? Jesus Christ Steve, you were just letting him undress you with his eyes and you were eating it up!”

 

Steve turned in his seat to look at Billy--Billy refused to look back. 

 

“This morning, at breakfast, all those words I said, it, it was hitting me that this, us, we’re  _ soulmates _ , Billy. Nothing and no one will ever change that. But you, you didn’t even want to tell me who you were to me. Couldn’t confirm what I thought I’d been feeling from the moment I met you. And, and you were just going to  _ leave _ . Leave Hawkins. Leave Max. Leave, you were going to just walk away from  _ me  _ like I don’t matter.”

 

Billy could hear the emotions in Steve’s voice. 

 

“I, I thought you, I thought you’d actually give me the chance I thought I had. You were never going to give me a chance though, were you?”

 

Billy doesn’t respond, but his knuckles turn white on the steering wheel.

 

Steve huffs, “You know, I am truly sorry about your mom. But you don’t get to hold that over my head because I couldn’t be there for you when you needed me the most. I didn’t even realize you were obtainable. I, I just thought you were an idea my Nana wanted me to hold onto because she didn’t want me to end up like my parents.

 

“But here we are, on a whim I followed you. I’ve followed you across the country because I believed that you’d let me use this time together to see if we could do this. To see, to see what was so great about our bond that your mom and my Nana couldn’t ever shut up about it, but you’re still building a wall between us. 

 

“You’re not letting me in because I never knew you existed for real when you could have used a soulmate’s comfort and love the most. You won’t even give me a chance to try to make it up to you. I think, I think I know why Nancy called me bullshit.”

 

Billy turned his head at that word. He’d heard the rumors about that night of the party--the night they met. He’d heard that Wheeler has called their relationship bullshit, but still strung him along afterwards like she did nothing wrong. Then just ran off with Byers. 

 

“It’s because she knew, she knew I had a soulmate out there who I would do anything for. Anything. And it wasn’t her. It wasn’t, it wasn’t her. I’d failed at the one thing she believed in--soulmates were bullshit. And I was bullshit because I’d just met mine and I think she could see it in me. 

 

“But if, I, I’m an idiot. I know that now. You, you were trying so hard to tell me that you didn’t want me on my birthday, but I was so caught up in the fact that you were real. I had a soulmate. A soulmate who was doing his very best to make it clear he didn’t want me. I’m sorry. You, you can drop me off at my Nana’s and go. I don’t, I can’t, I’m not going to allow my selfishness to hold you back from the life you were trying so desperately to get back to.”

 

Billy couldn’t take his eyes off of Steve. Couldn’t stand the tears that welled up and fell from his eyes. He wanted nothing more than to wipe them off Steve’s face and tell him that he’s the idiot.

 

“You mind if I hop in the back to sleep the rest of the way? I marked the map for you, uh, she’s on the outskirts of the city limits up near one of the reservations. It’s, it’s a ranch. My grandpa also breeds purebred horses. Just, just wake me at the gate to the property. I can walk up to the house.”

 

Billy can’t move. He can’t say anything. He can’t even nod, but watches as Steve shifts and awkwardly climbs into the back. 

 

He knows that if he were to try to open his mouth all that would come out would be the sob that seems to be stuck in the back of his throat. He can feel his own eyes burning as he fights the tears building up along the edge of his bottom eyelid. 

 

He glances in the rear-view and can’t really make out Steve. He quickly puts his car into drive and squeals tires getting on the move again.

 

He doesn’t even make it a mile before he feels his own tears fall.

 

He makes it another twelve before he has to press buttons on his radio to pick up a station instead of static. 

 

He’s following the sun west. Glancing at the map occasionally, making sure not to miss any of the highways Steve marked. 

 

He’s not sure how long his own tears fall but he makes sure not to make any sniffling sounds. 

 

By the time he sees a ‘Welcome to California’ sign the sun had long since set.

 

He knows he’s looking for the I-8. 

 

By the time he reaches the gates of Steve’s Nana’s house, Billy has only heard soft snores from the backseat. His own tears have left dried, salty tracks down his cheeks, and there was a man waving him towards the gate.

 

“Hey, uh, Pretty Boy, we’re here,” he says a few times. 

 

He rolls down his window to greet the man.

 

“Ah, the young sirs, she’s been expecting you. She’s going to tell you you’re late, but go on up. Just follow the lane. You may park in front of the house, one of the staff will park it in the garage for you when they’ve unloaded your luggage.”

 

“I, I’m not, uh,” Billy tries but the man just waves him off.

 

He pulls forward through the gates and watches them close in his mirrors, when he glances into his rearview he meets brown eyes. 

 

“Hey sleeping beauty, we’re here,” he says lamely.

 

“Oh god, she’s going to be waiting for us.”

 

“I can turn around.”

 

“He wouldn’t open the gate for you.”

 

Billy turn up the curved hill and onto a well illuminated parking pad in front of a rather massive house. 

 

There were four people standing on the porch waiting for them. He immediately spotted Nana. The woman looked pristine and very put together, even at almost eleven at night. 

 

The three others on the porch made their way to his car, opening both doors as he parked and turned the ignition off. 

 

“Just the two backpacks and duffle bag, please. The rest are his personal belongings,” Steve said to the guy at the trunk. Which Billy didn’t even realize had been popped.

 

“Ah, my Piccolino! It has been too long!”

 

“Hi Nana.”

 

Billy just watched as the older woman met Steve halfway and pulled him into her arms, a genuine hug. 

 

He felt her before her actually saw her look at him.

 

“Ah, Piccolino, this must be your tesoro! He’s so handsome! Excuse me, where are my manners. Hello, I am Steve’s Nana, you may call me Nana.”

 

“Hello ma’am, Nana. I, I’m Billy.”

 

She smiled, “A William! How perfect for my Piccolino’s anima gemella! Please, come in. Are you hungry? I can have them reheat dinner for you, unless you’d rather retire to bed after your long drive?”

 

“Food sounds wonderful, Nana,” Steve said with a smile.

 

He looked at Billy, who stared back. 

 

“Princess slept the last stretch of the trip, would it be rude if I chose to retire?” Billy asked.

 

“Of course William, I’ve had them put your things in the room at the end of the hall. Take a left at the top of the stairs. Breakfast is served at 8.”

 

“Nana, his name is Billy, please use the name he prefers,” Billy heard Steve say as they were led into the house. 

 

Billy could work hard his whole life and never be able to afford this kind of lifestyle. He wouldn’t want it, but he gets the appeal of it. He’s pretty sure the appliances in the kitchen are worth more than his car.

 

“This way young sir,” one of the staff from out front gestured towards the stairs. 

 

He followed the guy upstairs and to the left like Nana had said. The room he was led into was larger than the whole house back in Hawkins. 

 

“Is that a pool?”

 

“Yes, would you rather go for a swim? I can provide you with towels and swimwear.”

 

“Maybe tomorrow? Thank you.”

 

Billy could tell the guy wanted to say more but seemed a little afraid to.

 

“I’m not like them, rich and shit, so you can just say whatever it is you want to.”

 

“I remember the day she brought home Steve’s pendant. And I remember the day the store called to let her know its twin had been sold. She’s waited his entire lifetime to meet _you_. She’s not going to care what you can and can’t afford, she’s going to care about _your plans_ with her grandson. I hope you _have_ a plan because she’s going to grill you while you’re both here. Have a good evening, sir.”

 

Billy just stood there, long after the door had been shut.

 

When he finally turned around to really take in the room, he noticed that Steve’s things had been brought in too. Their bags sat side-by-side at the foot of the bed. 

 

What really caught his attention though was the small box sitting on top of Steve’s backpack. His curiosity got the better of him and he didn’t even have to remove the lid completely before he noticed the white glow coming from inside the box--this was _Steve_ ’s pendant. 

 

_ He  _ was making it glow.


	9. Momma's Rules

_My William David,_

 

_I know how much you actually hate goodbyes so I’m getting it over with first. You will be the hardest for me to give up. The day of the diagnosis I could only think of the moment you were placed in my arms for the first time. YOU are the best thing I’ve ever done with my life, baby._

 

_You taught me the meaning of the word love. Sure your daddy’s my soulmate but this, a parent’s love, a mother’s love, it’s so different. It’s so much more. I never thought it possible._

 

_Your dad’s not going to do so well, and I wish I could tell you how long it’ll last, but one day it’ll stop hurting for him. I hope. I know a lot of this might not make sense now, but I hope you keep this and reread it as you grow into the wonderful man I know you’ll be._

 

_And I hope it stops hurting for you too._

 

_Sweetheart, I am so sorry that I’m leaving you when you need me the most. You have no idea how much I’ve loved our little reading sessions together._

_I want you to know that I know, without a doubt, your soulmate and you are something special. I’m biased because you’re my baby, but your pendants, the saleswoman asked if she could call the other buyer to notify them that the pair had been finally sold._

 

_I met her, the grandmother who bought it for her grandson._

 

_We talked about the two of you for hours. He was already a year old, and you were only a few months, but we could tell you both had pure hearts. We didn’t give up your names so I’m still sorry I can’t help you on that front. Oh, baby boy, she lit up talking about him! Much like I did when anyone would listen._

 

_She told me that she believed in pure hearts. That sometimes pendants weren’t necessary because their hearts and souls would just know they were meeting their match. She was adamant that your pendants would glow should you ever get close enough to each other, or even touch the other’s pendants._

 

_William, my sweet, you deserve nothing but the best when it comes to the one your soul will love with all it has. You deserve someone who will love you through everything life throws at you. Everything. Including me, this._

 

_I know you love me, sweetheart, don’t ever think I don’t know how much you love me. Ever._

 

_You treat your soulmate right, you hear me? He deserves to be loved in the same way he’s going to love you. Wholeheartedly and unconditionally._

  


_Since I can’t be there to help you out, I’m going to list 5 rules I want you to follow when it comes to your heart, you hear me? I have a feeling you’re going to find your soulmate when you’re least expecting to find him, but that doesn’t mean you’re not allowed to love others._

 

_Momma’s Rules:_

  * __Do unto others as you would have done to you._ _  
__  
__I never took you to church, that was all your daddy’s side of the family, but it’s the one thing we could all agree on that was important to teach you. It’s one of the first things I noticed about your daddy actually. He’s always been big about respect and responsibility but he always went out of his way to get my attention. His buddies gave him so much grief every time he’d come to my work. He’d bring me lunch every day. He always asked me the night before what I wanted and would either make it or buy it for me. And all of that before we were married and living together. When we found out we were having you, oh, sweetheart I wish I’d captured his reaction. He was so happy! He cried the first time he held you too! I’m sorry, I’m getting distracted. When it was time for me to stop working, I’d bring him lunch every day. I didn’t have to call because by then we were married and I made him lunch every morning anyway. Mostly because he burned water, but I always ate whatever he’d made me because it was the thought and effort. What I’m trying to say is treat others how you want to be treated, even if they’re not treating you nice. You show them how to be the better person. But especially your soulmate. Baby, you’re going to want to do anything and everything for him. I just, I hope you realize how happy he’s going to make you.__  



  * _Honesty is ALWAYS the best policy._ _  
__  
__This one is a given. Remember the first time you tried to lie to me about your skateboard putting a hole in the wall? Oh you tried so hard and I tried not to laugh at you, but it’s a good thing you’re a bad liar sweetie. I hope you’re never a good one. Your daddy would always tell me, when we were just starting to date, that he appreciated my honesty. I’d tell him I never saw a point in anything else. If he made me mad I told him. If he made me happy I told him. If he needed to walk away because I was going to shoot him he would. But he too told me when those things happened. We talked about it when we took the time apart to cool down and worked through it. I remember one of the first arguments we had after realizing we were soulmates. He’d be so ashamed if he knew I was telling you this. Your daddy, like I said, couldn’t cook to save his life. He’d tried so hard baby, so hard to make me a special dinner. He thought it was our anniversary and I’d told him no, he was off by a week. When he pulled out the burnt and smoking chicken he’d put in, I laughed. I couldn’t help it, it really was just one of those moments. He got so mad, I’d never seen his whole head get that red before. I set the table as usual, and we tried so hard to cut through that burnt skin but it was futile. He stormed out and I was curious so I glanced through the recipe he had open on the counter and I’d found where he messed up. He was supposed to turn the heat down after the first hour and cover it foil. He came back while I was still reading and asked me then and there if I’d marry him. I looked him in the eye and asked him why should I? He said, “I know I mess up more than I succeed in making you happy. I have a short fuse, but I also know that I’ve never felt like I do when I’m with you when I’ve been with anyone else. I can’t offer you the world, which is what you deserve, but I will spend the rest of my life giving you what I can if you’ll have me. Plus, you’re the only person I know that will eat what I cook. Even my own Mother won’t touch what I make.” I’d told him where he messed up and if he wanted to try again he could next Tuesday, our actual anniversary. He just stared at me like I’d hung the moon. I held my hand out and asked him where my ring was. It wasn’t the best proposal in history, but it was our moment and very true to who he and I are to each other. He told me I had to wait until Tuesday for keeping up with the authenticity. We joke a lot, and it’s something I love that you’ve been able to see glimpses of. We were always honest with each other. If something bothered him, he told me. I want you to have that kind of openness with your soulmate. I hope you have it._  



  * _Cheaters NEVER prosper._ _  
__  
__A soulmate’s betrayal is one of the worst things to experience. That kind of betrayal is horrible no matter if your partner is your soulmate or not. It means you weren’t enough. If you ever feel the need to stray from your soulmate you tell them. You be honest with him. Don’t you ever let him feel like he’s not enough for you. Or you for him. It goes both ways. If he ever deems you not enough, you let him go. It will hurt and you’ll cry and be so angry, but you’ll never get over that kind of trust being broken. My mom left my dad when I was 17. It devastated him. She never had another successful relationship, constantly leaving for another. Obviously, Pop-pop found it in his heart to love again because you’ve had Grammie wrapped around your finger since the moment you were put in her arms._ _  
__  
__Tell your daddy that he’s not cheating on me if I’m gone. He can move on. I want him to._  



  * _ALWAYS FORGIVE._ _  
__  
__Before you came along your daddy and lots of other men were drafted to Vietnam. He came back a different man from Vietnam. A lot of them did. He knew it. His temper was shorter. He yelled a lot. I’m glad you seemed to have calmed him down. Grounded him some. He always apologized to me. Always. And I always forgave him. Just as he always forgave me when I got so frustrated with him and would yell back. Or when I struggled the first month you were home. I kept thinking something was wrong because you were always so calm and so happy. Oh baby boy, you only cried when you were hungry or tired. And your smile, I think even on your daddy’s darkest days, your bright smile turned him into mush. I hope he remembers your little cherub face and that smile when he gets frustrated with you as you grow up. Know when you’re wrong and apologize for it. And accept when your soulmate apologizes to you. Don’t hold onto that. Holding onto forgiveness doesn’t hurt the other person, it hurts you more. I really wish I could be there for your first fight phone call. You’re probably going to be stubborn about your soulmate. Remember, William David, I made you. I know you. This is the one person that might love you more than I ever could. Forgive him when he pushes your buttons. Presses your boundaries. Forgive him and then love him. Just like he will forgive you and love you. Unconditionally._  



  * _Actions speak louder than words._ _  
__  
__You’re going to know who your soulmate is before your pendant glows. You’re going to know because you’ll feel it warm as your distance grows smaller and smaller. Remember how I told you your daddy would bring me lunch daily? He also made sure to rub my feet during my last trimester of pregnancy with you. He’d spend all day at work, come home, kick off his own shoes, and we’d go to the couch and he’d sit me down, tuck my legs up on the couch and then sit down and put them on his lap and he’d massage my feet and legs. He always made sure that I had orange juice in the fridge, just like I always made sure he had a fresh thermos of coffee to go in the morning. I also made sure that he always had a box of his favorite cereal tucked in the cupboard. He’ll deny that he’s got a sweet tooth, but don’t let him fool you. We did more than just the expected for each other because actions do speak so much louder than words. Find out what makes your soulmate tick when he’s not working a crowd. Find out what makes him melt into your hands. And let him do the same for you. Know the little things you can do for each other because you love each other. Actions will always speak louder than words and if you’re anything like your daddy, you’re going to struggle to say those three little words. I have a very strong feeling your soulmate won’t though. He’ll tell you he loves you every day. And you’d better let him!_  




 

_I’m going to miss you so much! I will always be with you though, you know that. Your daddy might get a little frustrated but he’s never had to do parenting alone before. Remind each other you need patience from each other._

 

_Your soulmate is a good person. Even at a year old to warrant that kind of talk from his grandmother, his soul will shine so bright for you. He’ll probably even be the one to call you to him._

 

_William David Hargrove, I’m only going to say this to you once, and you can reread it however many times you’ll need to growing up--don’t you ever hold him not being here for you during this time against him._

 

_You’re so very much loved by me and your daddy. If you need to get mad, be mad. Be angry at me for leaving you so early in your life. Cry if you have to. Don’t let your daddy tell you that how you feel is invalid because you’re a boy. You can even tell him I said so! He’ll always listen to me._

 

_Daddy and I talked about it, we’re burying our pendants with me. I’d always wanted to pass them on to you just for a keepsake, but life throws wrenches into plans sometimes. This one’s a big one._

 

_Grieve for me only for a little while. Then live your life sweetheart._

 

_Love,_

_Ma_

 

_PS:  Never stop reading!_

  


He’d forgotten some of the words in her letter. Despite the fact that he keeps it folded up in his wallet at all times.

He’d woken up before Steve, and even before the sun rose. He knew it might be rude to be seen wandering around in his sleep clothes but he didn’t care.

 

Last night was something.

 

He knew that Steve was his soulmate because his pendant reacted to Steve, but to actually see another person’s pendant react and respond because of him--his heart soared.

 

He slept on the couch in the far corner of the room and gave Steve the bed to sleep in. Despite a brief protest from Steve to share. They were soulmates, that should mean something to them.

 

“Ah, good morning, Billy. Did you sleep well?”

 

He hated that he jumped. Even more that she smiled.

 

“Morning ma’am, uh, Nana. Yes. I did, thank you.”

 

“You’re unsure of what to do now aren’t you?” She asked.

 

“You met my mother.” He ignored her question.

 

She regarded him a moment and then sat down in the chair beside him.

 

“I did. She was very beautiful, your mother. You look just like her. Steve told me she’s passed, I’m so sorry for you.

 

“I remember getting the phone call from the store telling me Steve’s pendant’s twin sold. I was elated, my Piccolino’s soulmate had been born! I remember the second call but was surprised to hear her voice instead of a staff member.

 

Oh, she was lit up with a mother’s love! She loved you so much. I think I loved you a little then too. She and I both, I think, needed to verify that the small ones who had such a hold on our hearts, they would be taken care of. I think even then she knew she wouldn’t see you grow.”

 

He waved the folded letter, “She uh, she mentioned meeting you.”

 

She smiled at him, and he could tell it was genuine.

 

“Did my Steve find his pendant?”

 

He nodded.

 

“Has he put it on?”

 

He shrugged, “I, I think so. He asked me to help him but I couldn't. I, I froze. He was up staring at it for a while before I fell asleep.”

 

“You strike me as someone who appreciates honesty, and I’m going to be very frank with you.”

 

She left no room for him to respond.

 

“He told me everything last night as we talked. Even about the scar that hides along his hairline. That was from _you_. He also told me that you had no intention of pursuing your bond. If that’s true, you will leave now before he wakes up. I can deal with the mess you’d leave behind now, and he’s strong enough to move on if that’s what you still wish. I can send for your things so you don’t disturb him.”

 

“You wouldn’t even let me say goodbye?”

 

“You wouldn’t deserve the chance.”


	10. "This changes things."

“He would hate you for taking that choice away from him. I’ve tried to make a few without him and he’s made it very clear that he hates it when someone makes a choice for him.”

 

“You still wouldn’t deserve it. It would only make it worse.”

 

“And it still wouldn’t be your choice to make.”

 

He kept her gaze, refusing to look away. He knew what she was doing. She had no idea how stubborn he could be. 

 

“Not my choice no, but I call him to check on him every Sunday. I noticed a change about the time you moved to town last year. He started asking me a lot of questions about soulmates when that Wheeler girl broke his heart.

 

“My Piccolino is a strong one, William, and I know that should you choose to leave he would search every inch of this world to find you. He never asked me about his soulmate because his father told him that what was expected of him, he’d be lucky to ever meet his soulmate.

 

“He grew up pining for another who would never leave him alone. Someone who would love him back with the same amount of love he has to give. You weren’t quite a decade old when your mother passed away, were you?”

 

He looked away from her, “I was eight.”

 

“He called me on what must’ve been the day she passed, not too long after you were told. He was crying and kept saying it hurts Nana, it hurts, and he didn’t know what to do. He felt your heart breaking at the loss of your mother. I didn’t know what was happening. It’s not unheard of that some soulmates, despite not having met, can share in certain things. Especially pain.

 

“When his Pap told him that it could be his soulmate’s heartache he cried harder. He was elated to know that he had someone out there. My Piccolino has loved you since. I will not let you hurt him because you’re afraid. So, I will ask you this only once more, what are your intentions with him?”

 

She’d put her mug down in a way that let Billy know she was serious. 

He could feel himself burning with shame and wanted a cigarette to calm him down.

 

“I, I don’t know. And, and I know you think that’s a cop-out answer but it’s the truth. It’s my truth. I don’t know what to do about this whole thing. I, I stopped believing in soulmates when my Ma died and I watched my dad place his own necklace in her casket. He, he was never the same after that.

 

“Even, even after he remarried. I, I didn’t think it was fair that the man my Ma had written me about in her letter could be the same man who was raising me. The same man who looked at me with nothing but disdain because I look just like his soulmate. That I was alive and not her. 

 

“I, the first time I felt my pendant change temperature I almost crashed my car into a guardrail. My step-mother couldn’t stop staring at my pendant each time we stopped to eat as a family. I, the first time I, uh, I take it off for basketball, so the first time I ever really interacted with him, I, I, Jesus, my fingers tingled whenever they touched him. And god, the first time I realized it was glowing, I, I...

 

“I, ma’am, my, my plans for coming back here was to get away from my old man. He’s, he hated that my Ma would tell me my soulmate was a, a, another boy. He’d, well he made it clear just what he thought about that. I, I have friends here. I, my old boss says I have a job and a place to stay, all I have to do is show back up. He, he even kept some of my things in storage for me.

 

“I, I told, I told Steve that, that I couldn’t give him a life that he was accustomed to, I, I’m not into all this rich bullshit, but I know, I know that I’d want to do my best to give him the very best of me that I have to offer. It’s not much, but I, I want to do that for him. He, he deserves better though. I, I’m an asshole like all of the time. I just, he’s so goddamn stubborn and wouldn’t let me leave him behind. Not, not without kissing me first and, and he just planted one on me.”

 

She was smiling at him. He hadn’t meant to be that honest and open with her but here he was, spilling his guts to his soulmate’s Nana of all fucking people. 

 

“Billy, thank you.”

 

“For what?” He hadn’t meant to snap at her. 

 

She reached out, gesturing for his hand, then clasped both of hers around his one. 

 

“I don’t want all of this for my Steve. He was never meant for the kind of life he was born into. He, he is so much more than money. He’s meant to be sharing his big heart with the world. I will naturally always take care of him, even after I’m gone he’ll be taken care of, me and his Pap made sure of that. He’s my first grandchild, of course he holds a different place in my heart than the others.

 

“You were honest with me, and I think yourself, just now. I’m sorry I purposefully antagonized you but you struck me as the kind of young man who wouldn’t be truthful with me unless you were emotionally compromised. Again, I’m sorry for putting you in that kind of situation. 

 

“He won’t go back, not without a promise that he’s allowed to come back to you. He told me of the deal you made to permit him following you west.”

 

“He wouldn’t abandon his kids like that.”

 

“For you, I think he’d do anything in his power. Now, stop entertaining this old woman and go tell your soulmate you’re not giving him up. I’ll give you both some time this morning. I can go out and grab some brunch to bring back.”

 

He just nodded. She squeezed his hand and let go before she stood up.

 

“I’m glad it’s someone like you who was destined for my Piccolino, William. He’s been too accustomed to other’s bending to his every whim. You challenge each other in a complimentary way that’s good for you both. I’ll be back by noon with some food.”

 

He glanced at the clock when she disappeared around the corner, it was only 7:15. He looked down at his cup of now cool coffee and chugged it. 

 

He was overcome with his nerves again. He felt his chest tighten and his heart race. He wondered if he could leave later. He was itching for the beach. To surf. To feel the sand between his toes and the rush of the ocean tides flowing. 

 

He washed his mug before going upstairs. He should find it odd that none of the help was around unless it was too early for their shift or something.

 

When he gets back to the room Steve’s still asleep. He’s on his stomach, one hand curled close--he can see the pendant in his clenched fist. 

He hates how emotional this sight is to him. How much he aches for it to be an everyday sight for the rest of his life. Steve was made to glow in the California sun. 

 

He goes and sits in the window because of course, this would be the kind of house that has window seats, and glances out at the property. He can see the garage now, and the front end of his Camaro sitting in one of the bays. 

 

He can see some horses running as the sun crests the mountains in the distance. Watches them for a moment. Always a little jealous of their freedom. He remembers seeing some mustangs that roamed freely closer to San Francisco one of the last times he saw his maternal grandmother in person. She’d told him the man who owned that land bought it specifically to keep them wild and free. 

 

He pulls his knees up to his chest, resting his arms on top and closes his eyes a moment. 

 

“I could get used to that view every morning.”

 

He startled at Steve’s voice, immediately turning his head towards the bed.

 

“I said the same thing a few minutes ago. You uh, you were made for the California sun, Pretty Boy.”

 

“You’re delusional.”

 

Billy watched Steve sit up and stretch and then as he climbed out of bed, still dressed in his clothes from yesterday and sat down at the other end of the window bench.

 

“You ever ride before?”

 

Billy shook his head, “Not a horse no, but I did ride waves when I lived out here. Took Max to the skate parks a lot too.”

 

“Want to go for a ride?”

 

“When’s the last time you actually rode a horse, man?”

 

Steve shrugged, “There’s a few stable-hands around. Plus Nana keeps me posted on which of the horses are most friendly. There’s a few wild ones here, but we don’t have to if you don’t want to.”

 

“Your Nana said she’d be back around noon with some brunch. I have not missed that word.”

 

“Maybe we could take it out on a picnic or something later? Is there anything you want to do? I saw that a pool bag was brought up for you, we could go swimming for a bit instead?”

 

Billy looked at him, really looked at him. He took in the earnest interest in his eyes. The way he was angled towards Billy, showing his genuine interest in this conversation--in Billy. 

 

“Uh actually, I am supposed to do something first. Your Nana made me promise.”

 

He mirrored Steve’s position on the bench.

 

“Um, we, she and I talked this morning.”

 

“She tried to convince you to not leave right? I’d told her not to. I told her to leave you alone about it.”

 

“No, just, hold on a minute! Wait, you told her to let me leave?”

 

“Well, yeah, I mean, I don’t want you to, but I also don’t want you to feel obligated to stay with me, or do this if it’s not something you want to do.”

 

“I don’t. Want to leave. I, mean, I, I won’t leave you again.”

 

Steve’s eyes widened as he looked at Billy.

 

“What?”

 

Billy shifted, scooting a little closer to Steve.

 

“You have to go back, you know that, right?”

 

He could see his jaw tick.

 

“I, I, I’m not, Steve, I, I’m not saying you can’t, you, you can’t  _ come back _ .”

 

Steve shot up to his feet and started pacing and Billy let him. He just watched as he mumbled to himself for a few moments before he stopped, turned to face him and put his hands on his hips.

 

“You’re doing this because you want to right? Not, not because, uh, my, she’s not making you do this is she? Like you actually mean what you’re saying to me right now? Because I don’t, I, I, I, I don’t think you understand how much I can actually handle right now.”

 

“Steve.”

 

“I haven’t heard back from any colleges I applied to and I don’t really have any skills worth marketing, I mean, I am a pretty damn good babysitter but I, I don’t know if people would think it’s weird out here that a guy’s offering babysitting services. Could we even live off of that kind of money?”

 

“Steve!”

 

“We, we, we have to have enough space because we both know that the kids will come and visit us. Max would murder both of us if we told them no. And, and, I just, why didn’t we talk about any of this on the way out here?!”

 

“STEVE!”

 

“WHAT?!”

 

“We’ll figure it out, but you have to go back and tell them. You have to say your goodbyes. You can’t just, you can’t pull a me. Max would definitely hunt you down and kill you.”

 

Billy hates the look on Steve’s face at this moment. The doubt that’s written all over his face.

 

“You, you’ll still be here, right? You, you won’t move and not tell me right?”

 

Billy got to his feet and walked up to Steve and put a hand on his shoulder.

 

“Tell you what, after brunch with your Nana, I take you out to my old job and you can see where my boss is setting me up. Then tomorrow, before you head back you can help me unpack.”

 

“I steal the covers a lot. And I snore a little bit. I’m really bad at grocery shopping like I can’t even follow a list. I’m, I, I haven’t slept as well as these last two nights in a long time and one day I’ll tell you all about it.”

 

Billy chuckled as Steve continued to ramble about all of his negative living habits. He’d let his other hand linger at Steve’s waist, letting his fingers play between the strip of tee and skin. Damn, he’d never been this close on a consciously aware level, to look Steve in the eye. His brown eyes were beautiful. He’s not even sure if the other boy realizes that he’s got his own hands on the lapels of Billy’s shirt, knuckles brushing against his chest as he talks.

 

He interrupts Steve mid-mumble about how he doesn’t sort his laundry but he hasn’t had any problems with colors bleeding by pressing a kiss to the other boy’s cheek.

 

When he pulls back Steve is just staring at him, eyes darting between Billy’s eyes and mouth.

 

“Hi,” he says softly, a smile on his lips. 

 

He watches as the apples of Steve’s cheeks tinge red and shift as the other boy smiles shyly back at him. 

 

“Hi.”

 

“Want to head to bed for a little bit longer? We’ve got hours till your Nana’s back and I’m kind of tired still.”

 

Steve looks at him and then glances away towards the bed, “You, you’d let me lay with you?”

 

“More like you’re letting me lay down with you.”

 

Steve nods and steps away from Billy first. 

 

They look at each other and then the bed and Billy can tell that there’s no going back from this. 

 

He walks to the right side of the bed, as he’d noted Steve was on the left earlier. He pulls the covers back, and okay, goddamn is that soft material, but he climbs in and settles on his back, watching Steve linger on the edge.

 

“I can get on top of the covers if you’re nervous or whatever, Pretty Boy.”

 

“It, it’s not that, it’s just, I, we, this changes things.”

 

Billy nodded, “Yes.”

 

Steve climbed in beside him and lay down facing Billy, so Billy turned onto his side so he could look back.

 

“Hello, Billy.”

 

“Hey, Pretty Boy.”

 

Billy closed his eyes and let out a deep breath. 

 

He felt Steve’s hand reach out and touch his own hand, intertwining their fingers, rubbing his thumb along any patches of skin it could reach. 

 

He knew that if this were anyone but his soulmate he’d be uncomfortable with holding hands, but this, this was Steve. This was his soulmate. 

 

“Thank you.”

 

Steve furrows his brows, “For what?”

 

“For not giving up on me.”


	11. Selfish

Billy smiled at the sight of the old shop coming into view as he rounded a corner. He was  _ home. _

 

“Hank’s Surf Shop. You worked at a surf shop?”

 

He glanced over at Steve, “Yeah, Pretty Boy. Tourists pay anything to make them look cooler to their friends, boyfriends, girlfriends, whoever. Plus the locals know Hank knows his shit about boards so when they bring their kids in, he’s not going to fuck ‘em over.”

 

“Will you teach me?”

 

Billy pulled into the alley beside the shop and onto the parking pad at the foot of stairs leading to the upstairs apartment that Hank would be letting him live in. 

 

“I don’t think you’d like it, but I’d be glad to teach you to try it once.”

 

They got out and Billy watched Steve look around. He took a deep breath and was glad to smell the salty air of living by the ocean. 

 

“Come on, I’ll show you around.”

 

Steve followed him around to the storefront, well the street-side storefront. Billy knew the actual front opened up to the boardwalk and beach with the workshop/shed for board making. 

 

He’d never admit how much he’d missed hearing that little jingle of bells above the door.

 

“Well goddamn, as I live and breath, is that my Willy Wonka?”

 

Billy grinned at the man behind the counter, “It’s me, Hank.”

 

“Sandi! Come on out here, I’ve got a surprise for you!” Hank yelled over his shoulder.

 

Billy watched the office door open and out popped Sandi. She lit up when she saw him and darted around the counter and pulled him in for a hug.

 

“Oh, my William Shakespeare! I am so happy to see you again! I told you it wasn’t goodbye!”

 

She pressed kisses to both of his cheeks and was taking him in, “You’ve lost your glow, but I guess the middle of nowhere does that to ya. Now, introduce me to this beautiful young man!”

 

He pulled back from Sandi and watched Hank approach from around the counter.

 

“This is Steve, he’s, he’s my soulmate.”

 

Sandi looked back and forth between the two boys and made a sound that Billy will never understand how girls can get a pitch that high, but he smiled as she pulled Steve in for the same kind of mama bear hug she’d just given him. 

 

“Two beautiful boys! Will you be moving in with Billy, upstairs? Oh, speaking of, let me go grab the keys and I’ll show you the apartment. If you won’t mind, a few advertisements just need to be put up in the attic space.”

 

“Sandi, darlin’, just breathe, and go get the keys.”

 

She cut her eyes at Hank but let go of Steve and rolled her eyes, “I’m just so happy to see our William home, sue me asshole!”

 

Hank just smiled, cut her path to the office off and kissed her on the forehead.

 

“It’s not much, but you do have a full kitchen and bathroom to use. At close, I can grab the truck and we can get your stuff from storage at the house unless you’ve got other plans?” Hank asked.

 

Billy shook his head, “I’ve got nowhere else I’d rather be.”

 

The curtains at the beach entrance made noise and Billy would recognize that head of hot pink hair anywhere.

 

“Well fuck me, if it ain’t the world’s largest asshole come back from bumfuckt egypt!”

 

He grinned, “Aww, don’t tell me you missed me, ‘cause I didn’t think about you once while I was gone.”

 

She crossed the shop and pulled him into another fierce hug, “‘Course I didn’t miss ya, I told everyone I finally snapped and drowned you and stashed your body in the marina. But damn, if I’d known they grow ‘em that pretty out east I’d have had you bring me one too! Do you have a brother? Sister? Jesus you’re pretty.”

 

Billy loved the flush that spread across Steve’s face.

 

“Hannah, that’s Steve, our boy’s soulmate,” Hank said, gesturing towards Steve. 

 

She got wide-eyed and grinned at Billy, “You fucker! You coulda told me you’d found ‘im!!”

 

“Tough shit about a sibling, he’s an only child. But uh, small world, you know that ranch your brother works on, in the stables, that’s uh, his grandmother’s place.”

 

She turned fully towards Steve, “Nana is yours?! I want to be just like her when I grow up! I mean, can she adopt me? Adult adoptions are a thing.”

 

Sandi approached, “Alright, alright Hannah-banana, you came back in for a reason, what’s up? Ms. Enid’s paying you well for teaching her grandkids lessons.”

 

“Right, right, uh, the red-headed one needs another strap for his board. I’ve never met someone who can break them like he can, but she keeps paying for the repairs, so I need a spare long.”

 

“Alright, come on, I’ll get one out of the rafters for you. Sandi, close up the street door and take Billy on up so he can take a peek,” Hank said, gesturing for Hannah to follow him out towards the beach entrance. 

 

Billy glanced at Steve who just nodded, he’s doing okay. Sandi smiles, jingles the keys in his face and says to follow her. She flips the sign on the door over to say ‘Please use beach entrance’ and leads them around the side of the building.

 

“I’ll let Tommy know you’re back, he can give your baby a fresh coat. She was not meant for snow,” she said looking over his car. 

 

She led them up the stairs and unlocked the door and held it open for him to go in first. 

 

“Now, it does need a little cleaning as its been vacant for a few months, but everything works. I’ve had Hank and Hannah come check everything every other two weeks. If your boy’s coming with, I can always swap out for a bigger bed, but right now it’s only a twin, but you can always keep it cozy,” she’d said with a wink.

 

“Thanks, Sandi. It, it’s great,” Billy said. A bit more emotional than he intended. 

 

“When Hank told me you’d called the other day and said you were on your way I expected to see you beaten black and blue like, well,” she glanced over at Steve and then back at him, “I’m just glad you’re here and no longer under that monster’s thumb. I can tell you’re both a little new to your thing, so I won’t meddle too much, but Steve, what’s your last name?”

 

“Harrington, ma’am.”

 

She stood up to her full height, all five-two and looked him dead in the eye, “Steve Harrington, my boy’s been through some shit, and I can tell you have too, if the look in your eyes says anything, but let me make it perfectly clear, if I’d ever had a child, I’d want them to be just like our Billy. That being said, if you hurt him, they will never find your body and I’d be smiling on the way to jail, do I make myself clear?”

 

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Good. I’ll get out of your hair, but if you need anything, just let me know. We’ll close up around 5 to go get your things tonight, don’t,” she put her hand up when Billy went to interrupt, “It’s my goddamn store, I can close early if I want to! Plus you’re the child we never had, let me spoil you.”

 

She pulled Billy into another hug and this time he could see the emotions in her eyes as well. Kissed his cheek and then headed out, shutting the door behind her. 

 

He looked around again, and it finally hit him. He was free. He was home. He felt his chest tighten but he was not expecting the arms that wrapped around him, pulling in against a chest. He immediately felt calmer. His breathing was still a little erratic but he wasn’t feeling his heart beating fast like he usually did when he felt like this.

 

“Hey, hey, I got you,” Steve said gently in his ear.

 

Billy wrapped his arms around Steve’s waist and just took the comfort he was offering.

 

“I don’t know how I’m going to sleep tonight. I, I’ve had you near me the last few nights and now you’ll be on your way back to Hawkins.”

 

“You know, you have shitty ways of telling people you’re going to miss them,” Steve said, and Billy could feel his smile against the top of his head, “But I feel the same way.”

 

“What time did your Nana say she was sending you a car?”

 

“Around four, she wants to make sure I have enough time before my evening flight home to get to the gate. She says out here it’s a lot busier than back home. What do you want to do first? Bring stuff up? Clean?”

 

Billy looked around and started to walk through the apartment. The living room and kitchen were in the same space, he could probably divide it with a small table or a couch. He figured the bathroom and bedroom were through the small hallway behind Steve. 

 

“Open up the windows, get some air flow, and stale air out.”

 

He moved to the windows nearest him and watched Steve walk off as he turned his attention to opening up the windows. Some had cranks and others were the ones that slid up or down. 

 

“Uh, Billy,” he heard Steve call from the bedroom.

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Can you help me? This one’s stuck.”

 

He headed back, already feeling relaxed as the ocean breeze began to flow through his open windows, and the sound of people at the beach filtered up.

 

He saw Steve trying to figure out the window by the bed. It was the only one of its kind, probably a quick fix for a broken one. He boxed Steve in, feeling bold, and ran his right hand down Steve’s arm, grasping his wrist to bring up to the pull cord.

 

“It’s an old-school window. Pulley system to open the slats.”

 

“Oh.”

 

He felt Steve shift closer, pressing his back against Billy’s chest. Watched as Steve pulled the cord and inhaled as the air rushed in, a heavenly mix of ocean air and  _ Steve _ . 

 

“You’ll come back right?” He hated how desperate he sounded.

 

He saw Steve nod, “No, I need to hear you say it.”

 

Steve turned in the small space to face Billy, bringing his hands up between them to cup Billy’s face.

 

“I need to say my goodbyes and pack up some things, then I’ll be back. I promise.”

 

Billy leaned forward, pressing his forehead against Steve’s, “I, I’m sorry for being so cheesy about this. Especially since I was, I was such an asshole.”

 

“I, I don’t want to go. I, I’m going to have nightmares and I know it’s selfish because you need to be here. You need this, and I, I can be back on Saturday. But I don’t want to go. Not, not, not now that I’ve got you.”

 

He presses a chaste kiss to Billy’s lips, his thumbs gently brushing along his cheeks. 

 

“What, what do you need, Pretty Boy? From me?” Billy asks a little breathless.

 

Billy’s eyes are closed, he can’t handle the desperation he’s feeling right now. Let alone how  _ much _ he’s  _ feeling _ . This is the boy whose soul shines for him. Whose heart loves him for all that  _ he _ is--in spite of all the bad. 

 

“I, I need you to look at me, Billy. Please.”

 

So he does. He opens his eyes and he sees everything he’s feeling reflected back at him in Steve’s eyes and all over his face.

 

“Is, is this normal? Feeling like this?” 

 

“I think, I think so. I, I mean, I, I’m pretty sure that I feel the same as you. Like, like you’re falling and flying at the same time. Breathing and can’t catch a breath at the same time. And, I just, I need,” he cuts himself off by pressing a heated kiss to Billy’s lips.


	12. More Is Not Enough

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey...it's me...
> 
> so, i follow immediately after that kiss...lemmie just say that uh, the rating is met but it's not my thing so i tried...i really did yall...this chapter wrote itself really...that's all i can say about it...
> 
> i'm also going on vacation next week 4.24-5.8 so i don't know when the next chapter will be up...it's been a long overdue getaway and i am beyond excited because this time next week i'll be chillin' on a beach, preferably with an adult beverage in my hand.
> 
> ps: please let me know if there are any mishaps...i tried to catch them all!

* * *

 

Billy’s fooled around plenty, and he’s no blushing virgin, but _this_ , here in this moment with _Steve_ , with his _soulmate_ , he _feels_ like one. He can’t believe that there are honest to god butterflies fluttering around in his belly. Or that he’s pretty sure that they both can hear how fast and hard his heart is beating. Or that he feels like the slightest of brushes of Steve against his junk will have him coming in his pants like he’s a goddamn pubescent teenager again.

 

He can’t get his fingers to work properly enough to start lifting the hem of Steve’s shirt, as Steve adeptly unbuttons Billy’s shirt. He’s never felt his body this lit on fire before. Like he can’t get enough. More is not enough.

 

When they press together bare chested, Billy knows the heat that erupts between them is mutually felt. Hands explore and grasp every inch they can touch as their mouths are still sealed together, pouring everything they don’t know how to say to the other.

 

He knows he wants more. He wants Steve to walk them backwards towards the bed and _devour_ him. He wants to wrap his legs around the other boy’s waist and hold on as he’s fucked, because what they’re feeling right now, it’s going to be fucking, none of that sweetheart, love-making shit, but emotional, raw, fucking because that’s how desperate the two of them need and want each other.

 

So Billy tells him. He pulls away, and should be a little disgusted by the spit trail that shows at their abrupt splitting at the mouth, but he’s not. He looks Steve in the eye and says, “Fuck me.”

He whimpers, and he’ll deny it to death, but he whimpers as Steve’s eyes dilate and he’s back to kissing Billy.

Billy feels Steve’s hands move down the front of his body and start fiddling with the button of his jeans, then as a hand snakes around and plunges in and grabs an ass cheek, squeezing and pulling Billy closer. He feels the hand still on the front tug the zipper down, and Billy has never, in his whole sexually active life, until right now, been more grateful that he opts to go commando majority of the time. He feels Steve’s hands move and start to push his pants down his hips, stopping at mid-thigh.

 

Billy knows that he’s not going to last long. It’s not even that it’s been a while, it’s just that this is his soulmate doing this to him. This is the one person who will love him unconditionally who is touching him in ways he hasn’t vocalized to anyone in a long time. It’s like Steve just knows where to touch, where to dig his blunt nails into, and all they’ve done is kiss and take their shirts off. Well, Steve’s pushed Billy’s pants down, but not much else is happening.

 

Billy chokes on his breath as he feels Steve’s hand wrap around his dick. He whines as Steve starts to move his hand, gently tugging and squeezing.

 

Billy doesn’t realize it until he feels his back slump against the wall that they’re still standing. He wants to tell Steve they should do this on the bed but he can’t articulate anything. He doesn’t even want to open his eyes and look down to see the proof of Steve giving him a handy. He’d blow the moment he opened his eyes.

 

Steve’s mouth is now latched onto Billy’s left collar bone, sucking what Billy knows is going to be a mark. His own hands are holding onto Steve’s waist as if he’s the only thing keeping Billy grounded. He feels like if he were to let go of him, he’d float.

 

Steve momentarily brings the hand on Billy’s dick up between them, and then pulls back, Billy’s eyes snap open; Steve demands him to spit into his hand. He does. Watches as Steve spits too and then like a moth drawn to a flame, watches as that hand moves back down, fisting and unfisting to spread their mixed spittle around.

 

It only takes a few more quick tugs before he’s coming, spurting onto Steve’s chinos, his wrist, and lower belly. He can’t breath as Steve still pumps him through his orgasm. His nails, he’s pretty sure are leaving crescent moons on Steve’s hips. His knuckles are so tense from holding on through that he doesn’t know if he can uncurl his hands if he ever lets go.

 

“Hey, I got you,” Steve says quietly, and so softly that Billy feels something in him break in the best kind of way. He meets those brown eyes that hold so much of what his soulmate is feeling and he falls head over heels again.

 

So he nods. He can’t trust himself to speak. He feels like a puddle of mush, but he’s also very aware of the inferno burning in his low belly, letting him know that his body didn’t forget his demand to be fucked. He thinks he could go all night if Steve would let him.

 

Steve presses a kiss to the corner of his mouth and tugs him away from the wall, and drops to his knees. Billy tries to tell him no, not right now, it’s too much, but stops when Steve motions for him to step out of his pants as he finishes pushing them down his legs. It doesn’t stop him from biting the insides of his thighs, or pressing kisses on his hips. Billy feels his knees go weak.

 

“Bed, I, I need,” he tries to get out, but Steve shushes him and is already back on his feet and leading Billy towards the twin bed.

 

Billy lets himself be led backwards towards the bed. Lets Steve cradle his head as he lays him down before sitting in the v of his legs, pressing kisses so soft and gentle that Billy, if he were actually in tune with his emotional abilities, he’s pretty sure he’d be crying because he’s never felt this loved in his entire life. He’s never felt like he should be this important to someone else before.

 

“Hey, hey, I, I need you up here,” he says as he tugs Steve up so they’re nearly face-to-face.

 

“Hello,” Steve says with a silly grin.

 

Billy can’t help but to smile; “I don’t want you to go.”

 

Steve just nods, “I don’t want to go either, but it’ll be better if I go say goodbye first.”

 

“I know, I, I know I said I want you to fuck me, but can, can we wait until you come back?”

 

Steve looks down at him and nods, “If that’s what you want, of course.”

 

Billy can feel himself flushing in embarrassment, “I just, I know if we cross that line, I won’t be able to let you leave in a little bit. I’m that selfish.”

 

Steve smiled, “I know.”

 

“You’re not upset?”  


Steve shakes his head, “How could I be? Do you have any idea what you looked like just now? Fuck, Billy, that was,” he trailed off and kissed Billy again.

 

“Can, can I uh, help you out?”

 

Steve smiled, “Only if you really want to. I’m not like, I don’t expect you to reciprocate just because.”

 

“Pretty Boy, just take your fucking pants off and let me suck you off.”

 

“Such a romantic asshole,” he said as he climbed off Billy and stood to remove his pants and briefs.

 

Billy watched in awe as every inch of Steve’s creamy skin was exposed as he pushed his clothes down his hips and legs. He loved spotting more moles that dot his soulmates skin.

 

He motions for Steve to come back on the bed. They maneuvered themselves so that Steve’s essentially kneeling over Billy’s head. Billy gives him no warning before he puts his mouth on Steve.

 

He feels a hand immediately grab a fistful of hair, and the other sounds like it’s trying to grab traction on the wall above them. Billy feels Steve’s thighs tighten and strain as he tries to keep himself upright as Billy licks, sucks, and swallows, allowing Steve to go a little further towards his throat with each movement.

 

He looks up Steve’s body, watching as he strains his entire body to remain upright, fighting to let go completely and give in to the pleasure it’s feeling.

 

“Billy, I’m not, I can’t,” he hears Steve stammer.

 

He swallows harder, sucking Steve deeper down his throat. He groans the moment he feels Steve start to pulse and just swallows and swallows his come.

 

He hears Steve’s breathing hitch and catch, hears the noises he makes as he orgasms. Thinks he can really get behind him pulling on his curls. He can live with a sore scalp if it means he gets to hear Steve make those noises again and again.

 

He lets Steve dictate when to pull out of his mouth.

 

When he does pull out, thighs shaking around Billy’s head, his hands are still fisted in Billy’s hair.

 

“Is, that, was, is that how you felt?” Steve asks a little breathless.

 

Billy looks up at him and nods.

 

There’s no shame in them coming too fast. They’d needed this moment between them. Billy’s never felt happier to put someone else’s dick in his mouth. Nor has he ever come so fast and hard from someone else’s hand.

 

Steve finally lets go of Billy’s hair and starts to shift to the side, trying not to knee Billy in the face as he swings his leg over. Billy just helps, tugs him down and they move and shift until they’re laying on their sides, facing each other, pressed close because twin sized mattresses are shit for two young men.

“Billy?”

 

“Hmm?”

 

“I, I think, I don’t, I, I can’t wait to spend the rest of our lives getting to know everything about you.”

 

Billy could tell Steve meant those words. This wasn’t a one-off just to see if they could work. Despite both of them trying to do that from the start. Or at least he was trying to. Only as a means to save himself.

 

“Same, Pretty Boy. Same.”

 

He watches as Steve closes his eyes, a soft smile on his face--he really is a pretty boy. Beautiful, actually.

 

As the sounds of the ocean waves crashing on the beach filter in through the windows, Billy realizes that while they weren’t loud per se, they could have potentially been overheard. He chuckles to himself.

 

“What’s so funny?” he hears Steve whisper.

 

“Uh, the windows; we weren’t exactly quiet,” he says rather lamely, feeling a little embarrassed about finding it so funny.

 

He feels the bed start to shake with their combined laughter.

 

They subdue and just bask in each other’s presence as they listen to life go on outside of Billy’s apartment.

 

It’s not until a while later they hear the bells tolling again, signifying the time.

 

Steve groans, nuzzling into Billy’s neck where he’d pressed his face a while ago, both boys dozing in and out of consciousness wrapped up together.

 

“I don’t want to get up.”

 

“It’s Tuesday, you said you’d be back by Saturday, that’s only 4 sleeps we have to get through alone.”

 

“Such a buzzkill you are,” Steve said with a slight nudge to Billy’s gut.

 

They both pull away and untangle themselves, sitting up and stretching.

Billy watches as Steve gathers his briefs and chinos, but starts poking around in a few of Billy’s things. He opens up the duffle and pulls out one of Billy’s band shirts.

 

“I could find you a cleaner one,” he offers, but Steve waves him off.

 

“I want it ‘cause it smells like you.”

 

Billy grins like an idiot and gets to his feet, moves around the bed and pulls Steve in for a kiss. He could get used to this. In fact, in a matter of days, they will be getting used to this.

 

Steve pulls back first and smiles, “Will you call me later? I land around seven, and should be home by eight-thirty.”

 

Billy nods, “Sure thing.”

 

“Good. Uh, I, can we say goodbye now, I don’t, I don’t think I could handle having to get in the car with you in arms reach.”

 

Billy just nods. He gets it. He’s not sure he’d be able to let go and allow Steve to get into the car.

 

“Maybe, maybe we shouldn’t have rushed his, I mean, I, I could’ve,” he started to say but Steve held his hand up as if to say stop.

 

“Billy, you _need_ this. _This_ is where you’re you. We’ll figure all of this us and we stuff out, but you, you’d have died in Hawkins. We both know that. I’m glad it brought you to me, but you, I think, I think you needed to come and find me and bring me home with you.”

 

Billy felt himself smiling, “You know, I said the same thing in my head earlier.”

 

Steve grinned, “See, soulmates.”

 

Billy just tugged the other boy closer, pressing his mouth along his jaw before capturing his lips once more.

 

A car horn broke them apart and Steve pulled away and darted out into the front of the apartment.

 

“That’s my ride,” he yelled back to Billy.

 

He pulled on his pants, not bothering to do them up and headed out to Steve, who looked ridiculous in his band shirt but at least it was loose enough to hang low enough to hide the obvious stain of semen on the front.

 

“Four sleeps.”

 

“Four sleeps.”

 

Steve kissed him once more before heading out the door.

 

This wasn’t goodbye. This was see you later.

 

Four sleeps.

 

They could do this.


	13. No Excuses

Billy had missed this. Getting up to the sounds of the waves crashing, and the smell of sea-salty air. Being able to go out and catch a few waves on his own before he had to actually come back and do a few things around the shop to get started for the day. 

 

Sandi and Hank had asked that since he was the closest, could he open up shop for them in the morning. Their earliest appointment time-slot was 8 am so he didn’t really complain. Plus, they typically let him go around two. 

 

Hannah showed up a little before eight every morning, and Hank rolled in around half-past. Sandie was the early riser like Billy. She bought him coffee from the shop he used to always stop by on his way over when he used to live here. 

 

The first day she gave him a cup with a logo he thought he’d never see again, she joked about giving him a moment alone. 

 

“Loverboy comes back tomorrow. What time’s his flight land so you can go and get him?”

 

He choked on the sip and looked at Sandi.

 

“What, you think I’m going to allow you to make your soulmate take a taxi?”

 

“Uh, he hasn’t uh, we,” he wasn’t trying to stutter like an idiot. 

 

“Don’t tell me he’s not coming back!”

 

“He is! Promise! We uh, we get distracted talking about other things, but I’m calling me uh, Susan later. She promised to stop by and give him any last minute items he could stow in a suitcase.”

 

“Oh, you get too busy getting off together on the phone to have adult conversations. I get it.”

 

He loved her, but right now, he hated that his face was burning with embarrassment. 

 

He lost himself in his laughter and in the work. He will never tell Steve that one group reminded him of those brats he’s always looking after, and imagined their first visit, crashing on the couch and air mattresses sprawled all over the floor. That curly-haired one, Steve’s favorite, would fall the most. He’s pretty sure Max would make sure her boyfriend mastered his balance before he was allowed to try a board in the water. 

 

Before he knew it he found himself standing at Gate B12, watching as the flight from Indianapolis unloaded.  His palms were sweaty and he was fidgeting, but the moment he laid eyes on Steve coming into the terminal it was immediate relief and calm spreading throughout him. 

 

His cheeks were hurting from how big of a smile he had on his face as he and Steve started to walk towards each other. He noticed that Steve had his pendant on and it was glowing. He untucked his own from beneath his tank. 

 

The moment Steve’s arms were wrapped around him, his around him, he’d realized that this is what he’d been feeling like he was missing all week. 

 

“Hi,” Steve said.

 

Billy pressed a kiss to the other boy’s mouth before greeting him with a, “Hi Pretty Boy.”

 

“You ready to take me home?”

 

Billy will forever cherish the way Steve said home in this moment. 

 

They ignore the stares around them in favor of not taking their eyes off each other. After all, it’d been four sleeps since they last saw each other. 

 

“I have like six suitcases. And I think Susan and Joyce said they’re going to send out a few boxes. Which I think means we’re going to get house guests a lot sooner than we may have originally thought.”

 

Billy says, “Whatever,” but what he means to say is that he could care less if all of Steve’s ducklings followed him off the plane right now and down to the baggage claim because all that mattered was he was here. He was here and he was staying. They were doing this. They were going to be each other’s soulmates in all the ways that mattered the most. But he couldn’t say something like out loud, he’d probably choke on air right now.

 

“I slept like shit too.”

He smiles at Steve and loves the faint blush that spreads across the bridge of his nose and onto his cheeks.

 

“Yeah, it’s been a rough few nights, but you’re here now, we should sleep like fucking babies.”

 

“I don’t think you’ve been around babies that much. They fuss and cry and are restless and sometimes they wake up a lot.”

 

“God, how did I actually miss this?”

 

“You love it.”

 

Billy realizes Steve doesn’t realize what he’s said.

 

“Yeah, yeah I do,” he says before pressing a kiss to Steve’s lips. 

 

“Come on, Princess, let’s go get your six suitcases and figure out how the hell we’re getting them all in the car.”

 

“I have faith in your abilities,” Steve says with a small cackle afterward. 

 

They link hands and begin walking through the airport, following the signs designated towards the baggage claim area. 

 

It takes Billy a lot longer than he’ll ever admit to anyone getting all of Steve’s luggage in his car. He can’t see out of the back, but they’re on the road home. Together. 

 

He lets Steve fiddle with the radio, even tells him he can have two buttons to favorite two stations on. 

 

When he finally pulls onto the parking pad at the bottom of the stairs he sees Hannah, Hank, and Sandi sitting, waiting. 

 

Before he can roll up his window he hears Sandi call out to him, “We’re here to help! Then we’re going out to dinner. No excuses!”

 

He glances over at Steve who’s glancing between him and her. He likes the small smile on his face.

 

“What’s shakin’ Pretty Boy?”

 

“I like her. She loves you. She takes care of you.”

 

Billy can feel his ears burning in the overwhelming combination of being loved and embarrassed at the same time. 

 

Everyone takes at least one suitcase up the stairs and makes a neat little stack in front of the new couch that wasn’t there when Billy left. 

 

“It’s a sleeper. Figured you’d need it. You boy told me he has a gaggle of children back east. And I remember Mad Max. She’d murder you and burn my store down if I ever told her she couldn’t come back.”

 

“Thank, thank you, Hank.”

 

“Steve, sweetie, you need to freshen up or are you good to go as you are?” Sandi asked.

 

“I’m good.”

 

She smiled, “Come on down, we’ll take the truck.”

 

Billy smiled. He wonders if Steve ever rode in the bed of a truck. 

 

And if they were taking the truck, that meant that they were most likely going down the beach a few miles to the seafood shack near the tourist pier. 

 

Billy and Hannah climbed right in and sat down. Sandi put a hand on Steve’s shoulder, “You want to give it a go or ride in the cabin?”

 

Billy grinned at Steve’s embarrassed flush but held out his hand as he started to climb into the truck bed. 

 

“I thought this was only done in movies.”

 

“Oh sweet baby Jesus, you’re sheltered!” Hannah laughed. 

 

“Princess can’t help it if he’s never had a full country boy experience.”

 

“Uh, not, not many kids my age had trucks.”

 

“Lots of preppy people for being in a town that smelled like shit all the time,” he told Hannah. 

 

Steve just shrugged and grabbed onto Billy once Hank revved the engine and started off down the alley. 

 

Billy watched Steve taking in the sights. Watched as the wind blew through his hair. Watched as the sun danced across the planes of his face and he was right, he was meant to glow in the California sun. 

 

He listened as Hannah started grilling Steve. Asking a billion questions that he knew Steve would only have to answer again once they were sitting at the restaurant because Sandi would no doubt ask him the same ones. 

 

Billy realized that what he was feeling was genuine happiness. He was happy for the first time in a long time.

 

He has his soulmate and his chosen family. 

  
Mama was right, he thought,  _ I hope you realize how happy he’s going to make you. _


	14. I've Got You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The End.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uh, this took me longer than i would ever like to admit in wrapping up....that being said, this chapter runs the whole range of ratings...just a fyi...
> 
> THANK YOU for sticking this out with me!! i really appreciate every comment, kudos, bookmark, and subscription you guys gave this! <3

* * *

 

Billy never thought his life would turn out like it has--in his favor.

 

He certainly never thought he’d get to wake up every morning next to his soulmate. _His_ soulmate.

 

It hasn’t been easy peasy, and they’ve had their fair share of arguments. He’s learned their couch is comfortable to sleep on if you just opt to put the cushions on the floor like a shitty air mattress. It needs both of them to get the pull-out unfolded, despite using almost a whole can of WD-40 on it. They will not tell Hank and Sandi it’s because of them breaking it in one of the first nights Steve came back. Steve fucked him a little too enthusiastically and they bent one of the support bars.

 

He hates how soft he’s become. Only doing an early morning class today because Steve’s kids land in an hour. He’s kind of excited to see Max. He won’t admit that out loud to anyone, but he is. He thinks grabbing a shower and not smelling like the ocean would be a good first impression for Steve’s kids as his soulmate and whatnot.

 

He’s surprised to be shoved against the door as soon as he’s in the apartment, Steve’s mouth on his. Hands scrabbling for purchase on his wetsuit that’s half undone, resting on his hips.

 

Steve hates it. Says it’s too hard to get off when Billy’s been in the ocean. But Billy likes how determined he is each time he takes it off. He’s getting better at it.

 

Or at the moment he’s got it unzipped, spread, and shoved down enough that Billy’s hardening dick is bobbing freely before one of Steve’s hands is wrapping around it.

 

Billy breaks their kiss by slamming his head back into the door to catch his breath.

 

“Hello to you too,” he says a little breathlessly as Steve presses kisses down his chest and abdomen.

 

When Steve’s mouth engulfs him Billy latches onto Steve’s hair.

 

He doesn’t want to question why Steve’s surprising him with a random blow job. Not that it doesn’t happen. They both just get in the mood to get the other one off and neither has had any complaints so far.

 

Billy’s hips start to thrust on their own and Steve just moans as he takes him further into his mouth and down his throat.

 

Billy hates how fast he comes down Steve’s throat, but Steve’s quick to get back on his feet and press a kiss to Billy’s mouth. Billy will not admit that he enjoys when they do this after sucking the other down--tasting himself on Steve’s lips, in his mouth. It kind of makes him stir again.

 

“You able to get it up again? I couldn’t help myself, but I really need you to fuck me before the kids get here.”

 

Shit. Steve always makes his brain short-circuit, especially when he can get him to come in minutes.

 

“That’s today.”

 

“Yup,” Steve says as Billy watches him undress his own body. Billy notices with avid interest that Steve is momentarily commando.

 

“That’s new.”

 

Steve flushes, “I may have been impatient in waiting for your morning to be over and got myself ready for you. But when I saw you come through the door I had to get on my knees for you.”

 

Billy isn’t even aware he growls before manhandling Steve so he’s the one now pressed against the door and Billy’s got him off the ground, legs wrapped around his waist.

 

He presses hungry kisses against his mouth. Fuck, he’s watched Steve prep himself a few times and it never lasts long when he watches because it’s a sight to behold. The noises he makes as he opens himself up, well, Billy’s definitely well on his way to being ready to fuck his baby.

 

He’s got Steve pinned up against the door and can feel how wet the tip of his prick is. His own is chubbing up again, on board with the way things are turning out. He shifts and maneuvers so he can hold Steve up with one arm while his other reaches behind to test how well Steve prepared himself.

 

Steve flutters as Billy’s fingers gently caress.

 

“I, I need you, now. Don’t, don’t fucking tease me!”

 

“Aww, Baby, where’s the fun in that? I just want to make sure you were thorough,” Billy says as he presses two fingers inside, met with no resistance. He knows one of his favorite things is the little noise Steve makes whenever his fingers enter him. It’s not the same noise as when he puts his dick in him.

 

“I was! I was! I promise,” Steve gets out between ragged breaths.

 

Billy twists his fingers and begins to search for that little bundle of nerves inside of Steve that makes him scream. He’s not let down by the sharp yelp Steve lets out as his body tries to go taught, but it can’t. Not pressed between Billy’s body and the door like it is.

 

“How much time do we have?” Billy says against Steve’s neck, pressing kisses and giving small bites. Fingers still moving in and out of Steve while rubbing that sweet, sweet spot inside.

 

“Enough! Ah, enough time for you to stop teasing me and fuck me against this goddamn door!”

 

“Ooh, someone’s a little testy,” Billy teases; fingers pressed against and rubbing vigorously inside.

 

He feels Steve’s hands trying to find purchase on the door and walls beside them, on Billy, but he can’t.

 

“You’re such an, _oh fuck_ , an, an asshole!”

 

“I can stop and grab a shower if you’d like,” he says completely freezing all of his movements.

 

“I will kill you,” Steve bites out.

 

Billy begins fingering Steve in earnest. He knows Steve can come untouched with just prostate stimulation. It’s the most effective way to get Steve to become compliant with any idea Billy has. It’s how they have a bigger mattress, with a sturdy bed frame.

 

He presses closer, mouthing at any inch of skin he can get to while Steve’s body starts to show he’s ready to come. His breathing is rapid, eyes are clenched shut, and he can feel his dick twitching between them on his upper abdomen.

 

He presses just a touch harder and then feels Steve come between them.

 

“That’s it, Princess, I’ve got you,” he says against Steve’s pulse point in his neck.

 

Steve’s breathing is all over the place as he whines, whimpers, and makes all of Billy’s favorite noises.

 

He gives him a few minutes to catch his breath before he’s shifting them again so his fingers are replaced with his prick. He slides in smooth in one go. Lowering Steve till Billy’s inside completely.

 

“ _Billy_ ,” Steve moans out, followed by incoherent mumbling.

 

“I’ve got you, Steve,” Billy reassures him.

 

Billy pulls back enough to look Steve in the face and feels himself twitch inside if Steve. Those beautiful brown eyes are blown so wide in arousal and affection and it’s all for him. His mouth is open, breaths coming out in harsh puffs. He really is fucking beautiful.

 

“ _Billy_ ,” he says again as Billy begins to slowly piston his hips, moving in and out just enough for Steve to feel him there too.

 

Steve’s arms wrap around Billy, tighter, adjusting their connection just a bit, and Steve’s whimpering. He’s never told Billy that he likes that gray area of pleasure and pain being overstimulated between orgasms. He’s never said it out loud, but his body tells Billy exactly how much he likes it.

 

Billy kisses Steve before pulling back and giving it everything he has still in him. Fucking Steve against the door. Hard enough that he’s going to have indentations from the seams of his wetsuit on his thighs. Hard enough that should anyone be coming up their stairs they’d hear the door rattling and could only guess what was happening on the other side of it.

 

Steve’s got his hands situated, one’s scratching at Billy’s back, blunt nails digging in every time he tries to grab for purchase. The other’s fisted in Billy’s hair at the back of his head.

 

Billy knows that his own nails are leaving crescent moons on the backs of Steve’s thighs, holding him up and in place. He will definitely be sneaking a hand up his shorts in the car to see how long they’ll linger.

 

He feels close again and says as much to Steve who just urges him on. He thrusts a handful more times before he stills, pressing in close, breathing at the junction of neck and shoulder as he comes inside of Steve. Steve, who’s now the one saying, “I’ve got you.”

 

They stay pressed close together, him still inside, Steve’s legs still around his waist until Billy’s breathing evens out and he pulls his head back.

 

“Hey, Baby,” Steve says with a soft smile and a thumb brushing along Billy’s cheek.

 

“Hi,” Billy grins.

 

“Let’s grab a shower and get The Party.”

 

He just nods, lifting Steve up to pull his hips back enough to slip out. Steve gently unfolds his legs from around Billy and Billy helps him get his balance. They exchange a few kisses, gentle and soft, and full of everything they feel for each other.

 

Steve’s learned that this is how Billy tells him he loves him.

 

Billy pulls back first, making sure Steve’s good to stand on his own, then quickly removes his wetsuit before shaking it out. He’ll hang it up once they’re out of the shower.

 

They make quick work of cleaning up, except for Billy taking the time to clean Steve up.

 

When they’re on the road, windows down, and hands interlocked over the middle console, Steve’s favorite local station playing, Billy gives Steve’s hand a squeeze.

 

“You ready for this?” he asks.

 

“Yeah, I’ve, I miss them. Plus I think Jane’s coming. Hop’s called at least once a day to remind me that she has to call daily.”

 

“Think she’ll try surfing?”

 

Steve shrugs, “Not sure, she and I both have things about water. I hope she does. You got me to get my feet wet, so who knows.”

 

“Did uh, Sue call?”

 

“Yeah, she said her and Max definitely will come out for Christmas. Said she didn’t want to intrude until then.”

 

Billy nodded and carried on. He loves that Steve sings in the car.

He waited at the curb, let Steve go in and meet the kids.

 

He heard them before he saw them, but will not tell anyone that he smiled at the sight of them. Henderson tucked under one of Steve’s arms, Jane holding his other hand. Max under one of Sinclair’s arms. Wheeler and Byers juniors trailing behind them.

 

He’s glad they followed Max’s advice and all had duffles rather than suitcases. It would make cramming the six of ‘em in the backseat more manageable with all their luggage in the trunk.

 

He gets out and pops the trunk, opting to help them cram everything inside.

 

He’s not prepared for the hug from Jane.

Definitely not for the one from Max.

 

“Hey, Shitbird,” he says to the top of her head.

 

“Hey, Asshole,” she says to his chest.

 

He clears his throat once they part and starts tossing bags into the trunk. Steve’s bossing the kids around to maintain some order of who’s sitting on who. But they’re giving him lip.

 

Billy closes the trunk and says, “Henderson behind me with Jane on your lap. Wheeler in the bitch seat with Byers on yours, and Sinclair behind Steve with Max. Let’s move.”

 

They quickly move and setting in the backseat, oddly comfortable. Like Billy wouldn’t know how to cram his car of people. Not the first time he’s had to do this with this many people.

 

He asks Byers to pick tunes, laughs as a cassette is thrust forward before he even finishes asking.

 

“Jonathan made me a tape for the trip. It’s not bad.”

 

“We’ll see about that,” Billy says. Knowing that it will be a decent mix-tape because he knows Byers the elder has some decent taste in music.

 

By the time they park at the apartment, they’re all singing loudly along to The Boys of Summer.

 

“Alright guys,” Steve says, turning towards the kids in the back once the engine’s cut, “We’re going to leave your stuff in the trunk for now, but I’m going to need you guys to follow me before we head on up to our place.”

 

Billy looks confusedly at Steve who just nods like it’s an answer to Billy’s unvoiced question of what the hell’s going on.

 

They climb out, stretching a little before Steve’s impatience has them following him down the side alley. Billy realizes that they’re headed towards the “yard” of the shop.

 

“Uh, Max, I have some folks who are excited to see you again,” Steve said before pushing open the side gate to reveal Hank, Sandi, Hannah, and the yard done up like a family barbeque is going on.

 

Max shoved passed everyone to get into the yard and beelined towards Sandi and Hank.

 

“Hey MadMax,” Hannah said, joining their little group hug.

 

Billy heard Henderson mumble, “That’s where she gets it from.”

 

Billy slides over to Steve, “You did this?”

 

Steve shakes his head, “Sandi. She wanted all the kids' names so she could set them up with a lesson one morning. She uh, she hit me when I said Max’s name. Then threatened you bodily harm for not telling her that she was coming too. But I persuaded her not to kill you.”

 

“My hero.”

 

“I meant it that first day here, I like her. She loves you. She loves both of you. I love that she takes care of you. And Hank too. They’re the kind of parents we deserved. Far better than the ones we were given.”

 

“You make me soft. I hate it.”

 

Steve smiles and presses a kiss to Billy’s cheek, “No, no you don’t.”

 

“Go enjoy your children. I’ll go take their things on up and get their sleeping arrangements done up.”

 

They shared a kiss before Billy left back the way they just came. Grateful to have slipped out unnoticed.

 

He made quick work of loading himself up with six duffles and upstairs into their apartment.

 

They’d already pulled the sleeper sofa out and said the girls could have that bed. He figured Byers and Wheeler could share their old twin, which they’d turned into a make-shift couch, or “day bed” as Hannah called it when she’d set it up for them. Which left getting a bed set up for Henderson and Sinclair.

 

Sandi’d given them an air mattress and a pump. He placed each of their bags on their designated beds and so help them if that’s not how he found them in the morning. He didn’t need Sue or the Cheif to come clear cross country to murder him for letting boys sleep next to their daughters. Christ if this is what it was like to have kids he’d pass. Let Steve handle it.

 

Once the mattress was pumped he went and dug out bedding for all of them to use. They might have to go to the store to grab some more pillows though.

 

Once things were settled to how he deemed them fit and ready he made his way back to the cookout.

 

Hank passed him a beer upon greeting him. Sandi knocked him over the head and scolded him for not telling her Max was coming before Steve told her. Hannah asked why Steve was friends with so many children. But commented that he really was very good with them.

 

They watched as Steve sat with the kids around a picnic table, smiling and laughing with them as they filled him in on their lives back in Hawkins. They’d get overzealous and Steve would have them all calm down with a breath and take turns until they all go so excited again and he’d repeat the process over and over again.

 

Billy excused himself to go and sit with Steve. Opting to sit behind him, putting Steve in the vee of his legs and just listened as the kids carried on as if him joining them didn’t phase them one bit.

 

Steve would take a sip from Billy’s beer until they’d both drained it.

 

When Hank announced that burgers and dogs were done, Steve told the kids to go on ahead first. He and Billy sat together on the bench and just watched as both of their families mingled.

 

Smiles and laughter all around.


End file.
